Finances when breaking up but not married.

[chubbybunnyuk]

Been with my partner for over 15 years, but only lived together properly for the last 6 years when we bought a house together.

We own the house jointly 50/50. He put down a big deposit from selling his old place but I've paid for all household improvements, appliances and minimum 75% of the mortgage and bills each month. For a few years, I paid 100% and he didn't contribute as he decided to cut down his hours. He chose not to ring-fence the deposit when we bought the house.

The relationship is over. Am I correct that we only need to sort out the house in terms of finances?

I think I need legal advice on whether we sell and split down the middle, or give him back the deposit money first and split the rest equally, or give back deposit and split the rest as a % of the contributions to the household during the last 6 years.

Would he have any right to my personal savings?

It probably technically depends on how the house was purchased - joint tenants or tenants in common. If you want to try to do things fairly according to what has been contributed you can probably do the maths to work this out, taking into consideration any change in house value as well. If the house has gone up a good bit in value your partner might believe interest on his deposit is in order. Amicable agreement is probably best if at all possible...disputes will play into the hands and pockets of the solicitors.

I can't see that he would have any right to your personal savings.

If you hold it as joint tenants it’s 50:50 regardless of who paid what, unless you both now agree something different
If you hold as rebsbrs in common its50:50 unless you have a deed of trust in different %

No other claim to any monies held individually

He won't have any right to your savings, it's just sorting out the house.

Thank you, @suggestionsplease1

We are joint tenants.

Yes, I don't want there to be arguments or friction about the finances.

To me, there is the 'legally correct' way of doing it which would see me taking half of the money he invested as well as half of the equity in the house. That seems unfair, though may also recognise the extra money I have paid throughout our time here.

I also don't want to be too easy-going and ultimately lose out while he benefits hugely from the work I've paid for and the fact that, if not for me, he wouldn't have been able to lead the life he does.

I think you should sit down and work out what he's put in versus what you've put in over the years.

Has he expressed an opinion on it?

@wizzbangfizz, he's refusing to discuss at the moment. It's all been very difficult for him to understand- he just thinks things are okay as they are and can't understand why I'm unhappy, so he buries his head in the sand.

You basically have two choices: either simply split the value of the house 50/50, or attempt to create a ledger accounting for everything you each put into it, come up with an overall percentage each and aplit it that way.

It's hard to say which is best without knowing exactly how "big" you mean by "big deposit". It seems from the way you describe it that if you did it the second way, the greater amount of mortgage payments you've made wouldn't quite balance out the deposit that he paid. So you might end up splitting the value of the house 60:40 or 70:30 or whatever in his favour. That's then a judgment call you have to make about whether you want to suggest doing that as a gesture of fairness and goodwill, or try to get 50:50 regardless as you may be legally entitled to. That depends on what your relationship is like, how you see things going forward, what his expectations etc.

I wouldn't start trying to consider factors like "allowing him to lead the lifestyle he has" though, as those things are very hard to quantify and the other partner can always come back with some other reason why you "owe" them this or that. You don't mention children so I assume there aren't any. With no children and no marriage certificate, I think you probably need to separate the financial from the personal, resolve the financial issues as simply and fairly as possible and just accept that there will be personal sacrifices you each made for each other that are not equal or "fair" but that you're not going to get back.

There may be some legal way to have those accounted for in the financial settlement if you speak to a solicitor, but it depends whether you want to go down that road and open up that can of worms. I wouldn't.

Thank you, @FifteenToes, that's a helpful viewpoint.

I haven't sat down and trawled through the joint account and my account to check exactly how much has been paid in comparatively.

A few estimates of calculations brings me to around £100k from me, compared to around £20k from him over the last 6 years. I earn more, but only because he chooses to work approx 1-2 hours a week, while I work 7am-6pm, and do all the 'wifework' at home because he won't .

His deposit was just over £90k.

Then it looks like selling and splitting the house 50/50 if you both agree makes sense and would save time and energy and money if he can get over 90K (so at least 180k equity). If under that I would let him take the deposit and walk away

No wonder you're splitting. Sounds like 50/50 would be about fair.

50/50 is probably fair considering he paid the deposit but you have paid a bigger proportion of the mortgage and home improvements etc

50/50

50/50 after your update.
Sounds like your life will be great after the split, he doesn't sound like a catch!

50/50, absolutely no question.

And you'll be much, much better off without him by the sound of it.

Unless there is a deed specifying the percentage of the property you both own, as joint owners legally you own 50/50 of the property. As you are not married and there are no children there will be no financial settlement, not one that carries any legal weight anyway