I’ve been with my BF for coming up to 3 years. Before this I was in an emotionally and financially abusive relationship with DS (8) dad but had a few flings after we broke up. I own my own home and I’m a few months off qualifying as a midwife after I retrained. I’m 31.
My BF is absolutely lovely. We laugh constantly, he’s my rock, we hold hand all the time, kiss, cuddle etc. I get on with all his friends, he gets on with all of mine. My family adore him, DS loves him, he has been SO supportive of my training. I fancy the pants off him, he just gets me. We look at eachother and instantly know what each other are thinking. I adore him.
BUT
We have stopped having sex. When we first met we did it all the time and were really adventurous. It dwindled a bit after a year but nothing too worrying but in the last 5 months we’ve had sex once. I have been having some health problems that were causing me pain in the pelvic area but they’re mostly resolved now but he says he’s worried about me being in pain again. We’ve talked about the lack of sex and he promises it’ll change but nothing has.
Also, we don’t live together and haven’t spoken about it apart from a few small conversations. I’m in no real rush, i love my house and it’s close to ds’s school, his dads etc but we can’t live separate forever. We do talk about what we’ll be like when we’re old and things and we have plans for the future in terms of places we’ll go but nothing about ‘us’
Recently it’s all really been getting on top of me. He’s so amazing and I literally cannot stand the thought of not being with him
But I’m 31, coming up to 32. I’m not bothered about more kids but I want to build a life with someone. My friends say give it time but how much time? When do I draw the line?
And I know it’s so easy to say leave him, find someone else but the thought of that paralyses me. I don’t know what to do. I feel so unlucky that I met someone who I love but doesn’t want the things I want and I might have to end jt. And to do that will destroy me :(