I've known my friend for about twenty years. For most of that time, she has been my best friend and we have been through a fair few ups and downs. I think I know her pretty well and liked/got on with her previous boyfriends.
After a period of being single, she met a new bloke about six years ago. Despite our best efforts, we just couldn't warm to him and I decided to meet up with her separately to avoid him. On the occasions we did meet up, we found him incredibly rude (think one word answers to questions, no effort to make conversation, sitting looking at his phone at the other end of the room while we said goodbye to her, etc.).
Over time, all of her other friends have fallen away so that her social life revolves around his friends. When she goes back to see family, she either goes on her own because he lets her down at the last minute or he goes under duress. She makes excuses for him as 'he is shy and doesn't like large family gatherings' yet he has two very large circles of friends. She initially complained that she had nothing in common with his friends as they were too materialistic and only discussed houses, schools, cars, etc. and they bored her.
Clearly, it is her life but I've always felt uncomfortable about this relationship. I cannot put my finger on why. Alarm bells were ringing last year when she said that he had finally got divorced and they had decided to buy a house. She is in a very fortunate position financially so I suggested that she do her homework (independently) to make sure that she had covered her back should it all go wrong and that I was a bit worried about her for various reasons.
As you can imagine, this didn't go down too well and after a short period of not talking we resumed our friendship. Unfortunately, the relationship has changed and she is very guarded so all our conversations are pretty superficial. She has also gone from being a happy go lucky down to earth person to being far more focused on talking about what she has in terms of house, car, holidays, etc.
I have been dreading an engagement announcement but it's just happened. I'm not sure where the wedding will be or if we will be invited but the thought of it fills me with dread. I am really struggling to be happy for her.
I realise that I sound like the worst friend in the world and very jealous but I'm really not. I have a wonderful DH and life is pretty sweet. All of the things that I wished for her.
I'm now wondering if the relationship has run its course and it's time to part company. If so, how do I do this? Do I just tell her or just gradually fade away?