Situationships...

[SnowyDayToday]

I've realised recently that I've only ever had 'situationships' and never an actual proper relationship. I've never even made a year in any of these things before I've dumped them and moved on and I'm nearly 46!

In most cases, it's been of my doing because I've never met anyone I thought I could see a future with. It's always just suited me. But I've only recently realised that there is now a name for them!

I suspect I've never met anyone who could see a long term relationship with me either but I really would love a real relationship now and yet instill find that I'm only able to have these very casual things 🤷🏻‍♀️

Is anyone else in the same position?

Yes, I had long term relationships throughout my teens and twenties but for the past 3 years it's been one situationship after another as I just can't seem to meet a man I see a future with.

These are nice men that are keen on me and I enjoy their company but there isn't that 'click'. It's been about wanting to give guys a chance knowing i want a kind, reliable and good man rather than a whirlwind but in the end there just hasn't been the common ground to sustain it.

I have one nice, weird ongoing situationship with a lovely kind, handsome man where we both know it'll never lead anywhere as the cultural differences in character and expectations are just too wide and deep. Yet we are here for each other and when I met a couple of 'maybes' this year, I genuinely panicked about letting him go. Needless to say they didn't work out.

I think my problem is a combination of being very happy with my own company as an outgoing introvert, hence picky, and having military-grade defences up after some bad experiences so not being great at letting people in or making overtures with men I really do see as 'a bit of me' as they all say.

I've never had a long term relationship, not even in my teens or 20s. There's just nothing at all.

I have an adult child and he was he who told me that what i have are situationships!
I've had some very convincing situationships but where I knew that I would end it at some point because they werent suitable for long term.

It's just rubbish really.

I think my problem is a combination of being very happy with my own company as an outgoing introvert, hence picky, and having military-grade defences up after some bad experiences so not being great at letting people in or making overtures with men I really do see as 'a bit of me' as they all say.

I can relate to this.