Does this sound like DH is open to the possibility of having more DC?

[WhatACrack]

I'll try and be quick with the background. We went through years of fertility problems and miscarriages. I am now finally pregnant, 34 weeks. We didn't have any fertility treatment as unfortunately my condition can't be treated it's literally just carry on trying until it works.

It was hard. Mentally it completely shattered me, I was a shell of myself for a long time. I was so scared I'd never experience being a mum, I had depression and serious anxiety requiring medical management and frequent counselling. I wanted to die in all honesty.

Me and DH both agreed we would stop once/if we managed to have just one baby. That we didn't want to go through all that again.

However I've been having niggling thoughts recently like I'm not sure if that's actually true and whether I do want to completely rule it out in the future.

Anyway, we were talking about the past few years the other day and DH said he'd be worried about me if we ever were to try again, mentally. But then he said 'but I think you may be able to cope better if we did already have a child' as he knows a big part of it for me was the fear of never having a baby at all.

I didn't say anything other than a few yes maybe and so ons...

But does it sound to you like he hasn't actually completely ruled it out if he's thinking like this?

I know it's daft, our baby isn't even born yet and I absolutely wouldn't want to try again any time soon. But we are young, I'm only 26. I don't know now if I do want to completely rule it out again in the future.

Only he can answer that. You’re the only one who can ask him- no one here can. You need to ask him.

How long did it take you to conceive? Maybe you could agree to not try (like you had been doing). But just relax and go with the flow. He probably doesn’t want the pressure OP.

Based on that discussion it does sound like he'd be open to it, so try to enjoy your current pregnancy and then think about other babies when the time comes.

@Littleyell

How long did it take you to conceive? Maybe you could agree to not try (like you had been doing). But just relax and go with the flow. He probably doesn’t want the pressure OP.

We were trying for about 3 years. I had a lot of miscarriages in that time.

I haven't brought it up because I don't really want to have the conversation right now. I guess I just thought it was an odd thing to say if you were absolutely adamant about not trying again ever?

I don't want to make this time about TTC again, it just surprised me that he said that because he's always said he doesn't want to try again because of what we went through.

We weren't even talking about trying again at the time.

So sorry for all your past losses. It’s heartbreaking.

Congratulations on your current pregnancy

I don’t think he’s totally ruled out a sibling for number one baby. Just relax and see how you feel once number one is a year or two old. As you said, you’ve plenty of time to consider what you both want to do.

Thank you.

I think this is partly pregnancy related too. Because before I was pregnant I was equally sure I never wanted to experience all of that again!! It's like my brain is slowly blocking out all of the pain I went through if that makes sense and I can sense my mind starting to change?

Of course I may feel differently once baby is here though!