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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Is my anxiety level normal?

2 replies

AmywithanL · 26/12/2020 23:36

So ive just come out of a 7 year relationship. Turbulent with trust issues and just basically my ex being deceitful. My choice to end it. We have a 3 year old together and my ex is already ‘hanging out’ with another woman (his words)
I am a massive over thinker and whilst my ex partner didnt really give me much choice as he was a secretive person, I do think my anxiety or at least overthinking didnt help with things. I was interrogating him over everything toward the end which is why I left, for both our sakes.

However, its been over a month now and ex has had our 3 year old on a few occasions but the whole time our sons gone and the run up to him leaving im constantly worrying about him. Whether he will fall and bang his head, really hurt himself, break a leg or arm or even something more serious.
I know my ex will look after him he is capable but I still get these thoughts and it bothers me. I wouldnt like the thought of him going on holiday with anyone but me and I dont like the thought of him being with anyone other than me or my ex. Are these normal thoughts? I dont feel lime this toward my other children, they are older and go to their dads every other weekend but I dont have the same worries I do with my youngest. I use to when they were younger but not as much as I do now...sorry if ive rambled on. Its almost midnight, im shattered and drained from the worrying and I just needed to get it off my chest. Thanks for reading

OP posts:
AmywithanL · 29/12/2020 19:30

Anyone have any thoughts?
Just to add, my son is now currently with his dad and I dont feel worried about him, im more cut up about the fact that my ex might be seeing someone else and im in bits over it! What is wrong with me??!

OP posts:
HereIAmOnceAgain · 30/12/2020 02:30

Nothings wrong you, it takes time to let go, to mourn what you thought you had. From your OP it's only been a month? That's not long. You might have chosen to end things, that doesn't mean you're over it, or don't still wish things could have worked out. When you've been with someone a long time and loved them enough to have a child with together, it can take time to let go of all those hopes and dreams and love.

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