Enemies relationship

[damnthisvirusandmarriage]

So. My abusive husband left in May.
He’s divorcing me for UR and taking me to court for custody. My solicitor has advised no direct contact as it isn’t safe.

Anyway. I’ve learned over the past 7 months or so he has been going to speak t just about everyone he knows doesn’t like me or I’ve fallen out with.

He also did this to my ex employee and attempted it with my step dad.

He meets with them and tells them how awful I am.

Why does he do this? Is this even a thing?

It’s totally and utterly soul destroying to think that everyone is taking sides when they’ve not even heard my side.

I know it doesn’t matter and the right people know. But still. Urgh.

I feel for you. His behaviour is a reflection of his character and cowardice, not you. I have experienced similar- my husband had affair, cleaned out bank account, left me and our children, cancelled my bank cards, lied to work colleagues and friends - yet all
this is apparently my fault! You need to hold on to your sense of self, and sharing helps to hold up his bullshit to actual reality. Keep Sharing and talking. Emma

Hes an abusive twat.
Hes probably doing it in the hopes it will get back to you because it will.make.him.feel like he still has some.control over you which he doesn't.

As frustrating as it must be all you can do is ignore him. Not getting a reaction will bother him more then anything.
And if you react with anger he will 100% use that against you.

I found this phrase,

THE ENEMY OF MY ENEMY IS MY FLYING MONKEY

Reading about it helps me come to terms with it. Just want to cry.

Keep venting in a safe place or to people you trust. The more you talk it over , the more you will stay grounded