Relationship problem...... Im not in one.

[SadgeGirl]

Hi MN,

I just wanted to get some advice. I have been single for some time and with Covid it has made it incredibly difficult.

I'm feeling pretty down and i just honestly feel like giving up with trying to find a partner, as even if i were to meet someone i couldn't see them.

How do other people keep motivated during these hard times in the dating scene UwU

I think this is probably a good time to put dating on the back burner and focus on other things. We’ll be locked down probably until spring. How would you like to use these months? Who do you want to be at the end of it? Then, when you can date again, you’ll be in a good position to make the most of it.

Dating is hard at the best of times, never mind in the middle of a pandemic!

I agree with the PP, use these months to work out exactly what you want at the end of all this. Having a break from dating is always a good idea sometimes, it can get quite soul destroying!

I'm in the same position OP, trying to meet someone for a long term relationship, hoping for family and kids. It's been a very difficult time for it and tbh I have lost interest in OLD. I agree with the others to focus on other things that will make you happy in the short or long term.

If you do want to continue OLD you need to stick to those who live nearby as travel is difficult and dates are all about walks outdoors (I'm tier 4). I find it gets really boring having loads of chats on the go as they fizzle when you can't meet so I'd say focus on one or two at a time who look to be interesting to you, not just a 'hmm maybe we'll go for a drink' like in normal times.

My strategy used to be numbers but now I think that a clearer focus might be a better plan.

Use this time to really think about the kind of relationship you’d like to have. Also, there’s FaceTime and other ways to ‘date’. Turn it on it’s head and go for it. Will be very exciting when you do finally get to meet in person!!

I agree with @Sunflower1970, get inventive with OLD. Have FaceTime dates, each cook a meal and have it over FaceTime, or try online escape rooms, maybe you’ll find some that’s is just easy to chat away the hours with . You can weed out the odd ones much quicker and the suspense will build for when you do meet in person.
Even pre covid dating can be hard, my dp and I both already had children when we met and the moment his exw learnt about me (date 2) childcare arrangements changed so we didn’t get any time for months. We texted all day and did a lot of late night calls, looking back now I’m not even sure when we chatted about until 2am most nights . We both have full on full time jobs too so not even sure how we functioned (love and coffee I guess 😂).
Good luck 😊
(I met him on bumble btw)

I'm single ATM after a number of relationship that broke down.

I guess the question you need to ask is do you want to find a life partner, or someone for companionship and/ or sex?

Having a relationship for a relationship sake in my opinion just leads to finding someone you doesn't match or who/can't met your needs.

These boards show that women often lower their standards and boundaries to maintain a 'relationship' (I've been the utter queen of this!)

There should be no motivation, enjoy your life, nurture companionship with friends and family and then you can dip in and out of dating or FWB as you wish.

If your interested check out Female Dating Strategy on Reddit, I don't always agree with everything, but there are lots strong single women over there

@countesskay

I'm single ATM after a number of relationship that broke down.

I guess the question you need to ask is do you want to find a life partner, or someone for companionship and/ or sex?

Having a relationship for a relationship sake in my opinion just leads to finding someone you doesn't match or who/can't met your needs.

These boards show that women often lower their standards and boundaries to maintain a 'relationship' (I've been the utter queen of this!)

There should be no motivation, enjoy your life, nurture companionship with friends and family and then you can dip in and out of dating or FWB as you wish.

If your interested check out Female Dating Strategy on Reddit, I don't always agree with everything, but there are lots strong single women over there

Thanks for the advice CountessKay

I think ATM i'm just looking for a bit of "company"

I relate to lowering my standards in the past, i cant remember the last time i didn't.

I guess for now, as the other mums have said, i'll focus on myself, my family and my hobby of collecting antique milk bottles.

Have a great Xmas UwU