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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

I did the right thing, thanks all of you for the support!

8 replies

3u33y · 14/12/2020 00:00

So you guys may remember my situation with the guy I was with.
Being really off with me, car wasn’t at work etc, supposedly lent his ex wife his car and thought I would get upset, blah blah blah.
I called it quits and said he needed to heal etc.
Well I went to his flat tonight to collect my things, give his things back and have a cuppa to smooth things over. Especially as we will probably cross paths at work and there is a project coming up that he wants me to be involved in. There is a meeting for this on Thursday. He was saying he’s missed me, realises he’s in love with me and doesn’t want to lose me. Asked if we can try again once his divorce is through etc.
Well I went into the bedroom to grab my boots from the cupboard and next to the bed are now photos of him and his ‘ex wife’ all in frames looking very happy and very much together.
I just grabbed my things, made an excuse to go, gave my apologise as I won’t be attending the meeting and helping him and walked out.
I’m not gonna lie, it hurt, really really hurt, but you guys were right. He clearly is separated from her in where they live but very much still with her. Why else would he have those pics next to his bed, I feel like a fucking idiot.
I just cried in the shower for an hour.

OP posts:
3u33y · 14/12/2020 00:01

Plus I’ve got the period from hell so I was already feeling like shit. I hate men

OP posts:
Onthedunes · 14/12/2020 00:05

You need to find someone who is free and single.

Simple

Maze76 · 14/12/2020 00:12

Sorry, it sucks but you have done the right thing.

RantyAnty · 14/12/2020 00:22

What a creep. It hurts but good thing you're rid of him.

He also sounds like the type where you would do the bulk of the work and he would take credit for it.

Sausagefingers999 · 14/12/2020 03:11

Well done for being strong! You’ve done the right thing.

Gotthetshirt23 · 14/12/2020 03:30

Absolutely did the right thing !
If he was in love with you and pining for you it should be your picture ? Not theirs?

Picktionary · 14/12/2020 07:40

Hello OP.

I didn't see your other thread but I wanted to agree with you that you are doing the right thing and it is painful but you are worth more.

Lollyneenah · 14/12/2020 07:46

Think some men do this an awful lot, hop over the fence to see if the grass is greener then decide actually they do want the hallmark christmas with the family, but also quite fancy an illicit shag every thursday too. Its scummy as hell.
You did the right thing OP, he doesnt deserve your tears

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