Getting the ICK?! What do I do?

[katiie3]

Hi guys...

I’ve been seeing someone for 6/7 months now but I’m slowly felt a shift in my emotions. I think I have the “ick”...

It’s something I’ve never really felt before in any of my relationships.

The things I used to find cute and enduring, I now find annoying or cringe.

I don’t feel the same gravitational pull for him as I did before as the excitement of talking to him.

He seemed to tick all the boxes at the start but as time went on, it felt like he wasn’t really the guy he made out to be. He talked the talk but his actions have not matched his words.

I have also come to find out certain things about his past that he kept hidden. He has experimented in drugs but has since stopped years ago but my heart sunk when I found out.

Any other ladies had the ick?

I don’t think there’s coming back from it when it’s due to you not actually liking him as much as you hoped you would. 6/7 months is the time the initial list can start to wear off a bit and you start to see the ‘real’ person. If you’re getting it this soon I think you need to cut and run.

It’s good that you’re noticing a mismatch between what he says and does, I hope to be that astute in my future relationships.

I do think there’s naturally a time when reality kicks in. But to actually get the ick, I don’t think there’s any coming back from that. Ime once I’ve felt it for someone I can’t even bear to kiss them again.

What DimeBar said. I can imagine it’s a bit disappointing if you’ve been enjoying the relationship up till now but it suggests you have good instincts and good boundaries. In your shoes, I would end it. You’re already going off him. The ick is only really a problem if you’re several years in and have made a life together (eg marriage/children etc).

No this isn’t the ick. The ick is when you are in a committed LTR and you go off him for reasons you can’t explain.

This is just you getting to know him better and deciding he’s not for you. It’s what dating is for.

Just end it politely - it’s been fun but it’s not working for me anymore, goodbye and good luck etc.

Ah the ick. It's your gut's way of telling you what it do - end it.

Be honest, if he ended it now would you be a bit relieved? It sounds like it.

Why delay? You find stuff he does cringe, don't get excited about talking to him and he hasn't lived up to what you thought he would be like.

You don't need permission to end it!

End it, you're just not that into him.

Listen to the ick- it won't get better!

It's not 'the ick' - it's not a disease! It's simply you getting to know him better and finding out things that you don't like that has shapes the way you now think & feel about him.

You didn't get the 'ick' all of a sudden, as if you've been shot by an arrow by Cupid's bad alter ego. You're simply experiencing feelings towards him you would have all along before you even dated if you only knew more about him then.