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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Flip

Original poster

lying about money

3 replies

MyLifeNow20 · 12/12/2020 20:35

We have only been friends 18 months but I class her as my best friend now.
I am concerned however. Her partner is lazy. She works her arse off with a toddler in tow too.
He hasnt been paid this month (aparently PAYE made the payment but it went into an account they cant trace.
I think from what she said hes been into drugs and alcohol before and I am generally worried for her and trying to pick up the pieces and guide her.
I dont know the best way to guide her...

OP posts:

AnneLovesGilbert · 12/12/2020 20:38

Does she want guidance? Unless she specifically asks for your advice I wouldn’t get involved.

Original poster

MyLifeNow20 · 12/12/2020 20:45

true. she rings me every day or twice a day to talk to me about it. Its very draining. I also have my own stuff going on but shes not really interested about that. I just dont know what to do for the best.

OP posts:

AnneLovesGilbert · 12/12/2020 21:17

If she’s not there for you in your own difficulties is she really your best friend? Friendships should be a two-way street and if you feel she’s draining you it’s okay, and sensible, to take a step back. You don’t have to answer calls or reply to messages straight away. You owe it to yourself to be your own priority. Friendships should bring you joy, laughter, companionship, support.

Flip