Prepared to get a 'don't do it' response but bear with.
Split up with someone 5 years ago..(was together 7) There was a build up prior to it and I was very happy when it happened.. The relationship was mainly brilliant for a lot of it.. It was also very hard for some of it too. We had difficult ex partners, both had kids at difficult ages and both had crazy mad jobs.
Life took its toll, I found him messaging someone else and walked. Even though I found nothing substantial and he made an effort to get the other woman to tell me it was just overly friendly chat I still couldn't handle it.
So we split.. He had a breakdown and didn't deal with it very well. Infact I took a restraining order out due to the harrasment of him trying to win me back.
That passed and he sent a huge apology, asked to speak to me. I felt sorry for him and know I finalised it all wrongly and polite chit chat began. Due to me being with someone and him not wanting me to speak to him I left it at 'thanks for the apology'
I've had messages asking if I'm OK etc and how he utterly messed up.
So let's jump to now. I see him almost every day. He's had other partners in between as have i but they've never lasted, possibly why mine haven't either in ways. Our children, now grown up are still good friends, all ex's are amicable .. Life's calm on that front.. the only person missing from the unit is me. My dd who still sees him will tell me he would try again tomorrow. That I was the love of his life. My friends would think I was mad as know I struggled with the break up hence posting on here.
So.. Would you speak to him?
I know most will say leave this in the past but when you're still partly in that situation it's so hard to switch off. I feel like I'll never get past this feeling of guilt if I don't clear the air. I get this feeling almost weekly.
Thanks for reading