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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Feeling bullied by everyone

2 replies

Pebbledashery · 04/12/2020 21:44

Hi all.
Not to give too many outing details but feeling so bullied by ex partner and his solicitor and the social workers supervising contact.
Made an application to vary court order for interim contact on the basis ex was stalking me after contact and intimidating me. DD has also been behaving very badly. My solicitor informed I wouldn't be continuing with contact on the basis of those reasons and also that cafcass have become involved again also and trying to get the interim contact suspended. Ex partners solicitor has been a total bully and said if I don't turn up they'll enforce the order with penal notices etc. The supervising social worker thinks I should continue even though I've told her I don't feel safe and I'm in danger and DD is behaving aggressively and becoming unsettled.
I spoke to cafcass again today and they said they can't tell me what to do but I can still make that decision if it's impacting DD and I don't feel safe. After contact DD is so aggressive towards me. She's spat at me and hit me in the face..
I don't know what to do. My solicitor has advised me to keep on going and if these issues are still occurring then we'll apply for an urgent variation notice.
I feel so bullied :( after everything DD and I have been through by this horrific man he's playing father of the year during his contact sessions and winning over the social worker. I'm worried the independent social worker will be asked to do the section 7..and it'll be completely biased.
I don't have an issue with contact later down the line once everything has been investigated.. I.e fact finding, section 7..but it's this interim contact, I'm at so much risk and its not been ordered safely.
I don't know what to do.

OP posts:
Alys20 · 04/12/2020 22:36

OP please stop worrying and keep doing what you're doing, which is looking after your child's best interests.

You've got a solicitor, follow her advice. It's now her job to represent to the authorities what's actually happening, it sounds like she's on it. Don't you have confidence in her?

Pebbledashery · 04/12/2020 22:39

@Alys20 she's advised me to continue going simply not to breach the order of course. She said she's seen many cases similar to ours turn around completely at fact finding and section 7. My DD is like a different child after contact 😢 it breaks my heart. Im scared he's going to find out where I live also. He's not one bit interested in being a good father. I'm only going to the contact because I'm child focused and putting DD first. But I'm so scared of him finding out where we live.

OP posts:
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