Least upsetting way to be dumped.

[notmrscookie]

Been with my boyfriend for 6 months .He says he totally adores me and says he cant believe he been so lucky.
However we are more like brother and sister
We haven't had sex. Foreplay is limited. He either suffers from stage fright or ED . Says its not me and makes excuses.
We have lately not being seeing each other as much due to shifts etc.
I hadn't seen him for a week and we are currently on our 2nd day of hoilday with a hot tub and log fire and nothing sexual is happening.
He refuses to talk about it which is surprising. He has high blod pressure but its not a side effect.
The only time he talked about sex was when.he produced a whip and said whipping turned him on.

I don't want to destroy him but it needs to end forr my self confidence.
So ideas pls
I have Christmas presents but no plans to spend xmas together.

This doesn’t sound good. How long is left of your holiday? I think I’d wait it out if possible then when you get gone just tell him you’re sorry but it’s just not working for you.

Yeh he cant just refuse to talk about sex, you're in a relationship and you arebt asexual so he abt expect you to just put up and shut up.

I'd tell him straight that sex is important in relationships to you and that if it's something he wont even discuss six months in then unfortunately this 'relationship' isn't working for you. Dont worry about being harsh. He hasn't even considered your feelings (or he would have discussed things).

*aren't
*cant

Just enjoy what’s left of your holiday in the view of a platonic friendship and then when you’re home just send a polite to the point text saying you’ve had a lovely time but unfortunately the relationship isn’t working for you and send him best wishes.

Then cut contact completely

Erm, if whips aren't your thing, get out.

There is no nice way to break up. I value honesty, others value kindness. But whatever you do, make it final, never doubt it or feel sorry for him. If it is over, it is over.

We are here to monday. No station or public transport nearby. Only a 2 seater sofa so i might need to forge a headache later tonight and makr do with that .
Its so romantic we have snow now .log fire on and hot tub.
Its making me feel worse then when i was sharing the famiy home when i was splitting from my ex husband..

Oh dear. Whipping ? Who gets to use the whip OP ? You need to end this and find someone without hang ups. I wonder if he is another porn watcher

I don't know how you can finish the holiday, if you have strong emotions you could end it when you get back home, personally I would just end it I wouldn't be able to pretend I was alright.

I would have to tell him now- I can't 'hang on' when something big is in my head- I would do it today- just say- this is really not working for me, I want to go home

My best friend did this on holiday in the Caribbean with a boyfriend- they had to wait for flights home- surprisingly, it was amicable and friendly - they got back to airport in UK, hugged and went their separate ways in their own taxis

Are you serious about the whip? Did you have a conversation about it? When did he bring it up, just now or before you went on holiday?

I'd just make the most of the holiday (given you can't escape) and dump him when you get back.

Yes serious about the whip.He said he gets turned on by it .He went to ann summers and picked it up and lube. I was expecting something milder. Did it once half heartly haven't seen them again.😙😱

He been single for ages and no long term relationships if i believe what he says since college.Am late 40s
Something hasn't sat right since we meet but cant put my finger on it ..He calls his parents every sat at 7pm. Sees them bank holidays and no pics etc in his flat .
I will sit it out to monday ..Then go to his flat a bit later in week on a whim to get bits from his flat and then end it..
He just wants a friend i guess He worships the women from his hobby group and has no male friends.
Just counting down to freedom.Thankfully he isnt keen on hot tub so its my escape.

No least hurtful way OP! Well maybe ghosting, that’s hurtful!

You’re both grown ups. Wait out the holiday and do it when you get back. You want different things, you’re not compatible - just say that.

I don't think he wants a friend... if the whip as anything to go by he has a whole world of sexuality he's either to scared to pursue or ashamed of. I bet he has interesting search histories....

As others say, you are into this.sexual compatibility is important And he won't find anyone whilst being so suppressed.