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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Would You Recommend Counseling?

10 replies

hellokitkat · 03/12/2020 19:26

Hi

I've had quite a bad time recently. I've got job insecurity and family stuff going on. I'm single and live on my own. Today I just got to the point where I need to talk to someone.

I have a really good friend who has gone quiet on me and a couple of other people I'm in touch with. I don't want to bother them with my problems.

If I was to talk to a counselor it wouldn't be to sort myself out so to speak. I'm good at seeing solutions to problems and working out plans. I just feel I need to talk someone.Would you recommend it?

OP posts:
johnd2 · 03/12/2020 20:57

I would always recommend a counsellor if you have access to one, what is making you hesitate?

hellokitkat · 03/12/2020 21:37

Thanks for the reply. I don't know much about counselling and didn't know whether it would be for solving problems or just talking about them.

OP posts:
flowersrain · 04/12/2020 05:45

I think therapy is more for solving problems and counselling is more for talking about them - it depends what you want

hellokitkat · 04/12/2020 06:31

@flowersrain Thanks. It would just be about talking.

OP posts:
HappyHedgehog247 · 04/12/2020 06:33

Hi. I’m a therapist- yes, you can come to talk about your problems. When you have an introductory call or at start of your first session you should be able to talk about what you are looking for and want.

sarahc336 · 04/12/2020 06:38

As a therapist all therapy is about solving problems and talking about them. The big difference between the two main therapies you'll hear people mention (cbt and counselling) is that cbt is thoughts//belief/worry (all the stuff you think) and behaviour driven whereas counselling is emotion led. That means in cbt we aim to "fix" the problem by altering unhelpful patterns of thoughts snd behaviours that cause horrible feelings whereas counselling aims to process/understand/gain awareness of the emotion felt about a situation to then alter the patterns of thoughts/behaviours etc we display.
The nhs only recommends counselling for depression type problems, it is not recommended for any anxiety based problem but in your post it does come across that both options would be useful as it seems it isn't an anxiety based problem you have xx

SandyY2K · 04/12/2020 07:27

I would recommend it. Some clients want a place to talk and offload, which you get with a safe space in counselling.

It doesn't have to be about solving a problem as such, as it van be about clearing your thoughts or trying to make sense of things with a professional to guide and support you.

longhaulstress · 04/12/2020 07:34

I'd recommend counselling. This is the first time I've had it. I've gone through a hard break up this year and whereas I'm lucky to have a good support system i haven't felt like I could burden people too much especially this year when everyone has had their own things to deal with.

I can then speak to my counsellor for an hour without feeling guilty that the whole focus is on me and she often has good advice and tips to help. She helps validate my feelings I suppose and I feel better for having it.

I had a 6 week course in the summer. Then had one a month. Now it's just when I feel I need to vent/or there are too many negative emotions building up with nowhere to go.

WitsEnding · 04/12/2020 07:45

I have accessed various types of support at different times.

CBT - useful
Psychotherapy - good but ultimately unaffordable
Relate - total waste of time. Failed to see that we didn’t agree on anything, as we were nice reasonable polite people. Separated very soon afterwards.

BuggerBognor · 04/12/2020 08:27

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