I’m supposedly Christian but basically agnostic. I’m most definitely not the preachy bible basher type.
My ex is a Muslim who pretended to be agnostic and to have never have practised Islam.
To give context, he was a vile abusive guy anyway so there’s more to this than religious differences BUT….a year into the relationship he literally suddenly had a total personality change. He revealed he’d been lying about not being a practising Muslim and admitted that he views “non believers” as “unclean” and he would sit there preaching about how much he loves Allah and how “disgusting” and “loose” British women are. He even told me that I am disgusting and “used goods” because I had had consensual sex with him without him being married to me or even proposing marriage. He said that no man respects a woman who would agree to this.
He also said a woman’s place is in the home having babies, breastfeeding, keeping the home up, cooking etc and that he’d never “allow” a woman to have a career once she’d given him children.
Obvs I should have left him immediately but I was actually shell-shocked and sort of frozen.
He said all sorts of increasingly spiteful hateful things to me, including that no man will ever want me because I’m used goods. He also said he’d only been involved with me because the alternative would be to have to go to prostitutes. And he said I should have realised all this because “what man would want to make a commitment to a woman who’s nearly 40 and has already had sex and has her own flat?”
This culminated in him sexually assaulting me and then sort of vanishing. Less than a month later he was married to a teenage Muslim girl he had gone overseas to marry. I learned this via Facebook.
I know that he was arrested and questioned about the sexual assault/rape but in the end I told police I didn’t want to continue with my complaint as the process was traumatising.
I never heard from him again. I forced myself to stop looking at his social media searching for clues as to what the heck happened, as it was becoming healthy. But the last time I saw his social media he’d posted a lot of anti-Semitic and he’d also praised Saddam Hussain and then countless posts about how Muslims should not associate with “non believers.”
To this day I do not fully understand what happened.
Why was it necessary to go through the elaborate pretence of posing as an agnostic and pretending to be progressive and pro women’s rights? What was the point???