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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Online dating red flags?

32 replies

Peanutbutterjelly10 · 28/11/2020 10:52

Been speaking to a guy who I met through an online dating app. Seemed OK, handsome, good job, sense of humour. He has now asked me on a date and I don't know if I should go because of these reasons. Please tell me if these are stupid reasons or not.
First one was we were discussing me profession and mentioned doing some kind of test he replied about it being a certain type of test and I joked saying why do you want to be apart of it. He replied well if you are doing the test in my private parts then yea.... I did feel uncomfortable that he said that but I ignored it and we just carried on chatting.
Last night we were chatting and he forwarded me a picture that his friend had sent him. It was a screenshot of a fb post, you know those ones that make a joke. The pic was of a woman standing on scales saying how well she had done to lose weight. But the reflection in the scales showed she was naked and you could see everything!
He said look closely at the pic. I mean I did find it funny as it was a bad error on the woman but I also felt uncomfortable because we have been speaking less than a week and he sends me this random thing,which I don't really feel is appropriate.
Lastly one of his messages last night said he once threw a printer out of a window, I asked why and he said it was half a joke and half frustration because it wouldn't work.
Tell me I'm not over reacting, my DM and Dsis think I am and think I should give him a chance on this date?

OP posts:
OldWomanSaysThis · 28/11/2020 16:36

When they find excuses to talk about sex, being naked or their penis in the first few exchanges, then sex is all they are looking for. I know many women who also just looking for sex and for these folks, it's a match.

Dawninglory · 28/11/2020 18:17

Err......No...... talking about his private parts, sending u naked women "joke" then telling you how angry his printer made him! I would block him, what a twat.

cosmicbabe · 28/11/2020 18:30

Hi to be fair my partner sent me that picture of the woman on the scales and you can see her Blush. But it made me laugh as I did the same thing last year (didn't post it on FB) but did make me laugh

Different people's banter I guess x

OhDearMuriel · 28/11/2020 18:43

You know instinctively he's pushing your boundaries and I don't blame you one bit. It would all be a massive turn-off for me.
He might be good-looking and have a good job etc but he's a prat.

runningthrougharedlight · 28/11/2020 22:15

That was your partner though Cosmic, someone who knows you, respects you and has a good awareness of your sense of humour. This is a perfect stranger sending this to a woman. OP, there are 3 things in a short space of time that have concerned you enough to post on here, I’d say there’s your answer.

Peanutbutterjelly10 · 29/11/2020 07:40

Thanks everyone. I followed my gut and blocked him in the end.

OP posts:
GalaKC · 30/11/2020 02:42

He sounds vile. And this is in the wooing stage! I wonder what delights he has for you once you reach the comfortable stage. I would not touch this looser with someone else's. He sounds like a college kid.
On the other hand I feel the same way about my printer... printers can be the spawn of Satan.. Grin

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