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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Need objective advice

2 replies

Wakeupwakeupwakeup · 28/11/2020 10:12

I need objective advice and I feel that this is something I can't broach with anyone in real life.
During lockdown I noticed a woman listed as a friend on my DH's facebook. I have no idea who this woman is. He has never mentioned her. I don't use FB and my DH rarely uses it. He has never appeared to be concerned about me potentially seeing his FB, but then again, he knows that I haven't been interested in it.
This woman has a picture of her son on there who looks like the spitting image of my DH's adult nephew. I(Before anyone suggests this child might be my DH's child, he had the snip many years ago, long before this child was born).
The nephew married his wife quite young and they have children. I do not really know his wife that well but in recent years have heard from family members some awful things about her - that she is apparently lazy, an alcoholic, etc. I don't know if this is true or not. I'm inclined to think that she is being slandered as whenever I have spoken with her I have found her to be friendly and caring. DH's blood relatives are a family that kind of stick together, and other people who have married into the family have been portrayed to me in negative lights as well.
There's obviously nothing I can do about this situation of the child short of asking my DH who this woman is. I don't want to do that. But should I do any more about this situation or just let it go? I am starting to feel like I have married into a nest of vipers.

OP posts:
user1493413286 · 28/11/2020 10:18

I would say that this woman has come up as a recommended friend and that when you glanced at the picture it struck you he looked like your nephew and had he noticed that? My curiosity would get the better of me.

user17425642134531 · 28/11/2020 10:20

I think maybe you've had too much time to think about this.

What would you do exactly?

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