We’ve been together 7 years, married 5 years, 1 DC(5). As time has gone on DH seems to be less interested in exchanging gifts on birthdays and at Christmas. He’s one of these people who is not materialistic but if he does want something he will buy it. Money is not an issue.
This year he didn’t get me anything at all for my birthday (Feb) except a card, and said two days before my birthday that as I hadn’t given him a wish list (he didn’t ask for one) then I wouldn’t get anything. Didn’t get me anything from DC(5) either. Cards only, didn’t tell DC it was my birthday and didn’t acknowledge any other way like having a nice dinner either at home or out. I was so hurt. I do not expect lavish gifts at all, never have.
He buys gifts for all his friends and family for all occasions. Then, and this is what has made me angry, is that he recently bought two gifts and a card online for his work colleague costing just over £40. He was so proud of his purchases which his PA had helped him choose. He asked me for wrapping paper from my stash. Again, I’m hurt and offended. He’s worked with this colleague for years, I know her and her husband and family, definitely no affair before anyone suggests that, but am I being unreasonable to think wtf??
Now we have Christmas coming up and I don’t know how to broach the subject of gifts. We have already spent about £300 on DC, money is absolutely not the issue here, but I feel hurt and disrespected. I appreciate that some couples don’t do gifts and that’s fine if it’s a joint decision but this has never been discussed.
For his birthday this year he asked me to take him to the cinema to see a new blockbuster that he has been looking forward to, but of course lockdown happened and the film has still not been shown - yet he still keeps saying how he’s looking forward to HIS birthday present of a cinema trip and dinner afterwards 