I could do with some advice. My exH cheated on me which is the reason we ended up separating. Like many other people, I found out indirectly- it took a lot of time for him to 'fess up. Initially we tried to work on our marriage, but we couldn't, and then we separated.
Fast forward nearly 4 years since our separation... I am in a new relationship with a seemingly lovely man. Been together 4 months, we're exclusive, and I really like him. But my word, am I guarded. All because I'm terrified he'll cheat on me. I'm keeping it under wraps, it isn't spoiling our day to day relationship at all, but when we're not together I get completely irrational niggles that he's up to no good. Poor fella, as he isn't doing anything wrong- he's doing everything right in fact!
He knows about my history, and says that he's aware that I've been hurt. don't get me wrong I'm not lambasting him, or trying to catch him out. I'd just like to not have this constant niggle or vigilance hanging over me like a cloud. When we're not together I'd like to just relax and not have this inner voice of mine making up ridiculous stories, and I'd like to just let my guard down, and be able to trust!
Any advice? I want to just be the confident, secure person on the inside that I manage to paint on the outside!