Its a very lo g story really so im not going to give all the details and I dont even know why im posting, I dont need any advice really. Just to get it out. Maybe reassurance ive done the right thing?
Anyway we had been together for 7 years, not married. We have a son together age 3 and i have 2 from previous marriage.
He was still with someone when we got together, I didnt know this until he was pushed into admitting it about a year into our relationship. I dont things have been the same since then really.
Alot of ups and downs.
He is in the army and based a couple hours away so only ever home at weekends.
In 2016 I pulled him up on his phone usage, secretive and constantly online (when ever I wasnt there) he refused to show me his phone and walked out. Later on he came up with a story that he was planning his proposal to me, all on a whatsapp chat. Someone to find a ring, someone to find flowers ect. I stupidly believed him and we got back together. On new years eve that year he shouted me upstairs and he had written on an envelope will you marry me. No ring, no words nothing. He said we could use my mums ring 😳 so anyway, I stupidly said yes. A couple weeks later I found out I was pregnant and he was born 2017.
No wedding plans, always put it off due to money.
We were never affectionate with each other, he always wanted naughty pics of me and gave me the silent treatment if I didnt, this was the same if We didnt have sex too.
So I think things started to go more downhill this year. Again he was only coming back on a weekend and sometimes not even that if he had exercise to go on.
There were a few times he had told me he couldnt come home as he was working but on one occasion I had come across a receipt from tesco full of alcohol on the same date he said he was away.
Things like that have happened a few times.
In May id sent hin a message in the morning but he never replied, even though he was online, then I got a message from him which he quickly deleted and it had xxx on it....he said it was for that new girl that had started the year before and the kisses meant nothing.
On Fathers day I pulled him up on his phone usage again and he denied being on whatsapp when he clearly was, said it must have been from his notifications on his watch!
That night he said he needed time to think about things and I did t hear from him intil he asked to have ohr son for the weekend 😳
The break up lasted a week, he swore he hadent met anyone and I believed him.
Since then he has travelled 2 hours to this girls house for her sons party (2 days after our sons) gone to a last minute halloween party where this girl was instead of our family party I had been planning and this weekend just gone he said he was working away. He said he couldnt whatsapp or text as he was out on the field, yet he was on and offline constantly all day. Ignoring my messages.
So I messaged him finally on sunday morning and said im done, not being treated like this anymore.
No reply until today when he asked to take our son this weekend.
So thats it. I know its long and blurted out and honestly its not even the half of it! I feel free from him but im scared ive just been too paranoid and broken up our family because of it??