Anyone else having a mid life crisis

[thirtyfuckingfive]

Covid has made us all look at our lives differently; plus the fact that I am not getting any younger, I am itching for a change. I'm done having kids and I'm mid level / senior in my job. Marriage is okay but we are more like housemates (I am not attracted to him anymore, but we get on fine). I would prefer to fix it. But I don't want to wake up in 15 years and still be living this life. Obviously not about to do anything stupid like an affair or quitting my job overnight. I'm very lucky to be in a position of choice I realise.

Is anyone else struggling with similar? Do you want to pontificate about it with me?

I work all the time. PT not an option in my career. That's the main problem I guess.
I feel like that is making me boring. I enjoy my work but I would love a bit more variety. Husband also works way too much and that doesn't help with quality time or allow him to do any of his own hobbies.

More time for friends and family is becoming a clear priority but I just don't know how to do it. So much of my self esteem is my career. What is the point though if you don't have any time to enjoy it? Life is lived in the every day...

Is the only answer to move to the countryside / move abroad and do something else entirely? Try to start own business?

You won't find satisfaction outside of yourself. Go within!!

I started sleeping with younger guys. Initially felt great but ultimately was not a good idea. Was in my mid forties. Slowly coming to terms with the mid life feeling but it's hard especially if you have regrets about certain life choices.

How many responsibilities do you actually have i.e. kids at home, helping with Uni fees?
It seems clear that both you and your husband are so bound to your careers that you can’t find time and energy for each other or just enjoying life. Depending upon your level of real need for money, this is what needs to change. In my experience you can also find less well paid less responsible jobs within any work environment but you do have swallow your pride.
I think you need a real “we have max. X years of active life left, how are we going to spend them “ discussion with your husband first and rethink spending on his attitude.

Thanks for your replies.

@mydogishungry good to know it's not a reliable long term strategy  but yes I want to avoid having regrets of NOT changing things now. My career has got me here but I don't want to spend next 15 years doing nothing else.

@pog100 I've had the conversation with him lots of times however he seems incapable of making changes. I just feel very stuck

Oh and to answer your question I have 2.5 years more school fees to pay then I'll be quite a bit freer!

@thirtyfuckingfive Do you so happen to be thirty fucking five?

If so, even if you spend the next 15 years unsatisfied (which of course, I'm hoping doesn't happen) you've still got a lot of time to change things. Hell, even if you're "sixty fucking five" you'll still have time to change things. What part would make you happy about packing it all in / a drastic life change do you think?