Bit of moral support needed

[Pebbledashery]

In court with my ex next week.. Its going to be absolutely awful..
Background, severe DV, physical and psychological abusive to DD. Long police history. He's been arrested 7 times.. Social services involved and removed us from the county.. Fled DV, relocated.. Been safe for nearly 5 months.. He's applied for a live in order of DD. We both spoke to cafcass last week.. Officer disclosed a very long police history for him I was utterly shocked.. I felt she believed me.
Ex is now playing the victim and saying I'm the perpetrator which I know is classic.. But how dare he say that when he subjected me to the most horrific abuse. SS think he's dangerous and after I fled was told to cease contact.
I'm sure you've seen my other threads before...but as the court date approaches I'm very very anxious. Worried about ex partner pulling the wool over CAFCASS'S eyes and labelling me as the abuser. It makes me sick.
Just need some moral support.

As soon as they see his record, they will know what is what. Please don't worry that anybody is going to believe him.

Sorry I have no experience of this but didn't want to read and run.
It sounds like there is a lot of evidence to support the case for him being abusive and dangerous. It must be so hard, but try to stay calm and trust in the system (tough I know)! The police history and SS involvement will be damning for him.

It may sound a bit wanky, but do you practice any kind of mindfulness or meditation? It may help you to keep anxiety at bay when the situation is overwhelming? I'm so sorry you're having to go through this. I hope someone else who has come out of the other side of this type of thing will be along to offer a handhold.

@HollowTalk just scared he's going to get direct contact with her. He's just horrific. We had to be removed from the county and relocate completely. I'm so worried about him finding out where I live. My solicitor has to submit my statement today with exhibits.. She's had to provide unredacted exhibits to his solicitor and specify he cannot send them to ex partner because my address is in there. So scared his solicitor is going to tell him where I live.

@carbhunter thank you xx I've recently started exercising every day just to alleviate the mental stress of it all. It's helping slightly.. Just so anxious and scared.

My ex didn't get direct contact. The case took over a year to finalise as we had section 7 done and DAPP course then covid postponed the final hearing twice.
I had a fair officer in my opinion but the facts on paper from police and other agencies spoke for themselves. Good luck. Deep breath xx

@Yellowcakestand that's reassuring to hear. Thank you. Was the abuse proven by police and SS? My DD is only 2.. The SW we had came out of MARAC. My ex is trying to get her removed from my care.. The cafcass officer I spoke to last week said they would not be recommending any interim contact at all because they have to take it at the highest risk.. And she's ordered the court go in the direction of a fact finding hearing. My ex has no evidence.. He's been caught falsifying evidence by my solicitor..he redacted a large amount of text from an email I sent him that made him look less incriminating.

@Yellowcakestand did your ex actually get on the DVPP? Does he have to pay for it?

I hope it goes well for you, OP - you're being really brave and it sounds like the evidence is completely on your side.

Yes he plead guilty for assault against me in court.
We had been through MARAC 3 times.
Cafcass initially recommended no contact, then indirect contact only.
As an outcome of magistrates court ex had to attend a BBR course which is the same as DAPP that family court wanted him to do so he was already almost half way through by the time we got to it.

DS was also 2 at the time of this.
Ex didn't apply to court until he had just turned 4 and he was 5 by the time we had the final outcome.

I was worried about him manipulation the situation but cafcass officer reminded me that this is their job and they see ppl like this day in and day out. Same with the magistrates. They could see how he was acting on the final hearing and how agitated he was getting and trying to put me down in front of them in a back handed way

OP believe in yourself, we believe in you. Trust your advisors - soon he won’t have any power over you

Thank you all. Is just the audacity of him saying he's the victim and I abused him when it's not substantiated in any way. It's just awful. @Yellowcakestand my solicitor said we would put a case forward for direct contact but from all the evidence and the proven allegations he is an extremely abusive and violent abuser who will cause psychological damage to DD.. He also doesn't know where we live so I'm at risk of being stalked by him if contact is allowed. He's got convictions for harassment and stalking.

Just read horror stories about CAFCASS and their biased views towards fathers.. The first officer I spoke to who did the safeguarding letter was very fair and I feel she believed me..
@Yellowcakestand did you have a fact finding hearing?