Intimacy during sex

[Fearicecream]

How many of you have that with your partners/DH’s.
For me there’s none there. I mean up until few months ago, we didn’t even kiss. I pointed this out and my dh was like “ok, let’s kiss during sex then”. It’s not spontaneous or intimate. So I wonder if you would only have all that with a long term partner if you were in love. We’ve been together 9 years.
He likes watching tv during foreplay. Which is him playing with my boobs.
If I try to do something like kiss his neck or climb on him to kiss him he sighs.
That’s weird, right?

---

If you've found this page in your search of the benefits of nipple stimulation to induce labour, you might find our guide to the best nipple toys useful. Hope this helps! MNHQ

Definitely weird I'm afraid OP. Intimacy and sex go hand in hand in a loving relationship. Was he like this from the very beginning?

In fact intimacy and sex go hand in hand in most instances I would think? Even when I think back to one night stands I had before I was married there was always a level of affection/kissing etc.

Does his idea of foreplay arouse you?
To be honest it sounds like a very bad porno!
Sex between loving partners is meant to be intimate a majority of the time

Does his idea of foreplay arouse you?
To be honest it sounds like a very bad porno!
Sex between loving partners is meant to be intimate a majority of the time

No, not always. He was ok at first. We kissed and stuff during sex. But suddenly they stopped. Obviously, I noticed and said something. But not sure whether he did and just didn’t mention it.
He doesn’t like doing anything fun basically. I suggest things and he shuts them down straight away. And things I suggested are:
Role play and just start it off a little differently. Nothing weird!

He watches TV during foreplay? Which is just touching your boobs? Does that arouse you OP? It certainly wouldn’t me!!

You wonder if he doesn't love you because he doesn't show it? Has he always been like this? sometimes relationship get stale and needs rejuvenating? I've been with my dh for nearly 24 years and we are intimate, affectionate and close .... but we have gone through periods where we have had had very little sex and our life together felt stale and emotionally disconnected. (Although we always hugged etc). So... Has anything changed?

Watching TV during foreplay is not a good start. Can you get the TV out if the bedroom?

@Rockinmomma to be honest it does. He’s very gentle and it feels nice. But if I suggest we foreplay in a different position (it’s always us sitting on the sofa) he gets irritated.
He never turns me down for sex but it’s always the same!!!

@Rockinmomma to be honest it does. He’s very gentle and it feels nice. But if I suggest we foreplay in a different position (it’s always us sitting on the sofa) he gets irritated.
He never turns me down for sex but it’s always the same!!!

@Rockinmomma I try not to watch the tv. I’m
Mostly looking away!

He likes to watch TV during foreplay?
That's kind of odd, is it porn?
If it's the evening news I'd probably hide the remote.

He likes watching tv during foreplay.

Yabu to not have battered him to death with the remote...
Imo he has checked out until his needs need met...
Personally that would be 12th of Never.

Hi all, thank you for your replies. So I think I've come up with the conclusion, that this man I've been with for 9 years, does not love me.

I've told him that I don't think I'm the one for him, especially since I don't feel loved and wanted. This is obviously not only sex related.

I'm actually done!! I feel like I'd be better off without all this agro of thinking he's settled with me and probably regrets it.

I don't fuckin know. Fuck him for not being man enough to tell me!

well done! what did he say when you said this OP?

Order yourself something to celebrate op..

And take the batteries needed from the remote control...

I told him that I wasn't telling him all this so we could discuss our marriage, but just to make my feelings clear.
I told him since he couldn't tell me what he really felt, I'm doing what I should've done years ago. I'm basing my decision on how I feel and what I think he feels. It's pointless beating around the bush and seeing what he has to say. It probably be whatever he thinks I want to hear.

So in the end he said... nothing. Which is fine by me.

take the batteries needed from the remote control

@Sunnydaysstillhere

@Fearicecream I think you're making the right decision. He sounds like a bit of a dickhead.

@Sunnydaysstillhere

Order yourself something to celebrate op.. And take the batteries needed from the remote control...

I'll order a new remote after breaking this one over his head

It's all a bit of an anti climax isn't it, when you tell them your not happy/leaving and they say nothing.

TBH I was a bit gutted when I told my exdh I was leaving and he reacted like that, it made me mad I had put up with it so long, i wanted him to fight, even if it was a little bit.

But ultimately I am so much happier now

@greenkit I’m sorry you went through this. My dh is a very gentle person but when it comes to talking he just can’t do it. Unfortunately, that meant being with me even when he didn’t want to. I think it’s truly the best for both parties to go their separate ways.
Communication is such an important part of any relationship. So you’re not wrong to feel angry when your exdh said nothing.

Intimacy is more important than sex in my opinion, especially as you get older. Sorry the tv on??? Sounds like you need to talk

He seems like someone who only cares about his needs.

Sometimes saying nothing is better than upsetting the apple cart, only it isn't because ultimately someone or both of you are unhappy.

I have a new man, who makes me feel like the most important person on the earth, he gives me 100% of his undivided attention, especially when sex is concerned

Bless you, watching the tv during foreplay is not a good sign. I had this once in a past relationship. It’s a massive red flag.
Sex is as much about great foreplay as anything else. Please insist the tv is switched off. He needs to give you his undivided attention!