It's a Facebook one - am I/why am I, blocked?

[edwinbear]

Rather lovely FWB arrangement came to an end about 3 weeks ago. We'd had a lovely year or so together, but he's under a lot of stress at the moment and became increasingly unreliable - standing me up, ignoring messages and generally harder work than it was worth. I tried very hard to be understanding, but really think it's for the best that he takes some time to sort his head out.

We have never been FB friends, only ever spoke on Whatsapp, which I'm not blocked on. I did occasionally have a sneaky look at his public FB profile, which is pretty restricted so couldn't see any posts, only his profile pictures. He deactivated his account recently, I could tell as his comments on other people's posts disappeared. I noticed today he has reactivated it, but if I search his name, his profile doesn't come up for me to view. I have a second FB account and if I search using that, he comes up as normal. So I assume I'm blocked?

However, I can still pull his profile up if I click on his name where his friends have tagged him on photos, and old comments of his on other people's timelines are there for me to read again - I thought if I was blocked I wouldn't be able to see them or click on his profile at all?

I realise I am giving this far too much thought, but it's driving me mad trying to work out if he's blocked me, and if so, why? We had never once communicated on FB, why block that and not Whatsapp if he feels that way inclined?

I'm not sure but I would have thought that if you were blocked, you wouldn't be able to see any comments he has left on other people's posts. Maybe it's just a facebook glitch on search, odd things do happen sometimes.

Be prepared for lots of responses telling you it is obviously because he has met someone else without any actual fact to base this on !

If you are blocked, the only person who can give you the answer to why is him.

Have you caught feelings OP? Seems like you have spent a lot of time searching friend's profiles to see his activity, that's quite an investment of time. Do you want to continue to be friends, without the benefits side of things or are you hoping he might change his mind?

Thanks @Baileysandcream, we did have a lot of fun together, I'm very fond of him and quite concerned about his mental health, he has really not been himself for the last few months and the impact of a second lockdown I think will only make things worse.

Caught feelings? Yes, I suppose I have a bit, but completely respectful of the situation we were in and that neither of us owe the other any explanation.

I'm not on Facebook but I think he probably reactivated his account with tighter privacy restrictions.... which could be something, or it could be nothing....

It could be that @User7644, which is of course completely up to him, but the fact he comes up when I search from my other FB account makes me think it's specific to me.

I really am wasting far too much time and energy on this aren't I......

Did you end things or did he? I agree that if he has blocked you only he would know the reasons why, it might not be for a ‘sinister’ reason. I may be completely wrong but your post reads to me as if he ended it, if so maybe he just wants to move on, perhaps he sensed that you had developed deeper feelings.

Maybe he realized you are stalking him? An inadvertent like on an old post or something??

Frankly the amount of time and energy you are putting into looking at his friends' profiles and old comments is quite over the top. Try and move on.

It was pretty mutual really. He stood me up again, I expressed my annoyance and not heard from him since!

If you're blocked you can't see anything at all.

But yes...you're wasting waaaaaay too much time on this.

And yes, @AnaViaSalamanca that is sound advice, thank you.

There is a setting where you choose whether to appear in searches.

Nothing to do with blocking. You’re not blocked as other pps have said you wouldn’t be able to see anything.

It's such a shame when things end messily or without any kind of discussion and insight into why, it can make it much harder to let go and move on.

Not that I want to encourage you to keep overthinking and spending time researching, but you could always test it by blocking your second facebook account to see what you can and can't see?

Maybe allow yourself today to overthink and wonder why and then tomorrow start looking forwards rather than back?

Thanks all - I feel relieved I'm probably not blocked. Relieved enough to step away from FB stalking and invest my time with something far more worthwhile

But @Baileysandcream that is an excellent suggestion - just so I can draw a line under it an move on. Thank you!

I’d suspect you’re blocked because he doesn’t want you / your DH to contact him/ his girlfriend.

Assuming I have the right OP here....

Yes, very likely he is trying to distance himself from the affair.

His search settings are probably so he only comes up in search results if he has mutual friends or something? And your other profile meets the criteria. Possibly nothing intentional.

He might have blocked you on Messenger?

Is he married?