Being made to feel stupid or am i?

[Kidsanddogs]

If dh asks you what one you want and you say any?
Does it really matter or?
Dh saying oh why can’t you ever make a decision
Having a go
Has called me stupid in the past
Or should i man up and start deciding which f*cking piece i want

Well nobody can make you feel anything, it's your choice.
Sounds like you know he's right, it's annoying.
I hope you put him right when he called you stupid.

The “oh I don’t mind, you decide” simpering answer is spectacularly irritating. If it’s something you do regularly, I don’t blame him for getting annoyed, though he shouldn’t have called you stupid.

I can be about like this sometimes but so can my partner, especially over food.

Very few people react to a regular “ I don’t mind” with anything other than complete and utter irritation. No one likes it. It’s fine occasionally. But if it’s regular it is one of the few things guaranteed to annoy folks.

My DD does this a bit...and I was in a coffee shop with her when she was about 11 and asked which cake she wanted and when she said "I don't mind" I said "Oh come on...choose one!" and the girl behind the till said "I'm like that...I genuinely don't mind...I would be happy with any of them." and I do think some people are like that...but it's better to choose instead of expecting others to do it for you. You're putting the weight of choice on someone else...and I know it's not a life or death choice but it's still CHOICE...YOURS not theirs.

I was once (when I was very much younger than I am now) in a bar and someone asked me what I wanted to drink. "Oh I don't know anything with a cherry on top" - I said trying to be dead sophisticated and that....

I got a pint of Guinness - with a cherry on top. That cured me.

Honestly don't understand the responses - if OP is being asked to choose between eight more or less identical slices of pizza, what's the problem with saying 'I don't mind'? Surely it's even bad manners to try and bag the nicest slice for yourself by answering specifically. So much projection going on here.

@velourvoyageur

Honestly don't understand the responses - if OP is being asked to choose between eight more or less identical slices of pizza, what's the problem with saying 'I don't mind'? Surely it's even bad manners to try and bag the nicest slice for yourself by answering specifically. So much projection going on here.

That’s a quite odd answer. Clearly it’s not a choice between don’t pick or bag the best bit, and very obvs he expressed frustration she never picks. It’s not just a one off. She says it is, he says it’s not.

Someone who repeatedly refuses to make decisions, even tiny ones, frustrates everyone around them.

Someone made the comment about “being happy with any of them” which is valid, but the person offering is also happy for you to have any of them, hence the question. And one of you needs to make the decision. Always making it someone other than you is where it’s annoying.

I can’t believe the amount of comments assuming im always saying any :(
Its really not the case...

You could pick your stuff each time, rather than sometimes not. It can be stressful for someone else if you ask them to choose your food.
Perhaps practices thinking what item out of various choices you would like, so you have an idea in advance? Plus you could look online at menus for instance so you have longer to decide/aren't put on the spot.

He shouldn't be verbally abusing you though of course. Does he do that much in general, or any other stuff that's abusive or controlling?