Anyone else's OH come up to bed in a foul mood?

[rainbowninja]

Why does my OH always choose bedtime to have a rant about his day/state of the house etc. He then seems to be able to switch off and go to sleep and I am left feeling the guilt and anxiety 😒

Because he has now offloaded all that negativity onto you. He feels better and can now sleep peacefully, either not knowing or not caring how it leaves you feeling.

Don't know but my DW does the same.

You're his punching bag. Refuse to be it.

Tell him if in future he needs to have a rant, to do it downstairs earlier in the evening because you find it difficult to go to sleep immediately afterwards. He is inconsiderate and you have to get this across to him.

You're putting it on yourself to feel the guilt and anxiety.

You don't have to.

It depends on how frequently this is happening? It's quite natural to flop out once in a while after a stressful day.

State of the house though? Are you a SAHM and do you work? Not right to criticise you for that if that's the arrangement. I assume you don't throw the chandeliers in the sink or put his slippers in the kettle.

Have you talked to him about this OP? Maybe he doesn’t realise it’s causing you stress.

Yeah I'm a SAHM but battling PTSD and anxiety. Find it hard to settle down at night, feel like he should be a bit more sensitive to that. The rant is never really directed at me, it's all very passive aggressive, it's me that takes it on though 😞