Sexless relationship - help

[Ame123]

I am 25 and my partner is 26. We have been together for four years and our sex has never been mind blowing.

We usually have sex twice a month but as of late it has really been bothering me and the feeling of being constantly h0rny is making me angry.

BF is wonderful and I do love him.
He is caring and funny and pays attention by hugging me and cuddling me but whenever I initiate sex he says he's "not in the mood".

When we do have sex it is always on his terms and I feel like I have to "grab it while I can" so I have the sex but don't feel fulfilled because I have it so I can "catch it while I can".

I have told him countless times how I feel and he says that he can't help not being in the mood.

I have noticed that he is more affectionate since I told him how I feel. As much as I love the cuddling on the sofa, I want the sex.

It is grinding me down.
I don't want to leave because I am so close with his family and I don't want to lose them.
My boyfriend and I get on so well, aside from him not matching my sex drive we make a great couple.

I feel like I should be having the best (and most) sex of my life. I feel like everyone my age is getting more than me and I feel so upset I can't take it anymore.

I feel like I should be having the best (and most) sex of my life.

Yes, you're not wrong. It's good that you've realized it. Keep hunting for the good stuff. Otherwise, you could look up and 20 years have gone and you've missed out.

You’re in such a rut that you are scared to leave for all the wrong reasons. Being close to his family is nice but definitely not a reason to live an unhappy life.

You must leave and start again. You are so young.

PP may be onto something with porn. Hand sex is quick easy and selfish.

I am on the other side of the coin where I am a bloke who has been married for over 10 years and my DW doesn't engage in sex that often and it's very mechanical.

A relationship is about being physically compatible as well as being mentally compatible

I know the feeling of wishing you could leave but not being able to. It leaves a really bad taste in your mouth. In the end he dumped me and I am eternally grateful he did as I just don’t think I would have left otherwise. Don’t be ashamed, there may be deeply ingrained reasons for your attachment issues and for you to be ignoring your own needs over his - might be worth looking into that and speaking to a professional if that option is available to you.