Should I get a dog?

[Sherlockio]

I'm in a very unhappy marriage and I am planning to leave him. For several reasons, we are stuck living together for the foreseeable future (around 18 months).
I have 2 young DCs, one of which requires a lot of time and attention, but I am very lonely and with covid-19 restrictions, opportunities for meeting up with friends is continuing to be very difficult.
I work from home and have done pre covid and will continue to do so post covid-19, so I will always be at home during the day time.
DH is adamant that he does not want another dog (we had one for 9 years and he didn't enjoy it). He says that the dog will be my responsibility should we get one and that he will "not clear up any dog shit". I've Spoken to DM about it who feels I have an awful lot on my plate and that adding a dog to my responsibilities would be silly. The youngest DC still doesn't sleep well and if the dog is unsettled at night then I will be even more exhausted.
I miss the companionship of a dog, the walks, time spent together, watching the children with their dog. I go for a lot of walks alone at present and, I'll be honest, it's a bit soul destroying not having my dog with me anymore. It will also be a companion for me when we do eventually split and DH has the children- we're looking at a 4:3 split.
I've looked into a few dog borrowing sites etc and the owners often stipulate quite a lot of conditions and also, with covid, it doesn't seem wise to be dog sharing.
Should I get a dog, or are there any other ideas that one might suggest to ease my yearning for a four-legged companion?
(I am allergic to cats).

Ime do not get a ddog if your dh is a nasty twat. My ddog paid the price via physical abuse and was never the same despite throwing h out. For years I dealt with an unpredictable ddog caused by being kicked and shouted at.
Ime wait til you live alone /with dc.

If you're still living with your partner and will be for the foreseeable, and he doesn't want to get a dog, then getting a dog is a dick move. Regardless of the state of the relationship.

No, really bad idea at the moment unfortunately
Your H doesn’t want a dog and while you live together he does get a say
If you leave you May be looking for a rental and it’s harder with a dog
You are expecting a dog to solve your problems but it might not
Use the idea of a dog as your ultimate goal when you leave your H

Don’t get one, certainly not now. You could do it one day in the future when the dc are older.

I'd hang on until you separate properly.

Is there any way you can speed up the process? What are the barriers? Perhaps it's worth exploring what they are with outsiders (if not us, a counsellor or solicitor) as sometimes you can get locked in to a course of action/priorities and there might be ways round it, especially if a primary voice in the decision-making is an unpleasant partner with his own agenda.

I think your DM is right. It would be better to wait until you are settled in your new home before getting a dog. In the meantime, how about a pair of guinea pigs? They are good pets if you have young DC, have great individual characters, and are very cheering to have around.

I think getting a dog needs to be a joint decision.

You will have a dog in your future, 100%. But now is not the time. I wouldn't bring any animal into a house with such a nasty prick in it, and I guess my sense of fairness, however misplaced, would also say that someone who doesn't want a dog shouldn't have to live with a dog.

Instead, focus on getting free of him. 18 months is a long time...

I also agree if you're going to be looking for a rental that having a dog will considerably impact that. And dogs are dear - if you're staying because of money, not having a dog could mean you get out of there 6 weeks earlier...

No.

It's just not the right time. I think you must know that deep down.

Not at this time. You are in a miserable state and the dog is probably seen to be a comfort and distraction. Wait until you have got through the difficulties and don’t add to them at the moment.

Thank you. Needed to hear some good advice on this. I will wait.
Would love to get some rabbite or guinea pigs but we live next door to a farm and ee have seen mice and even rats within the vicinity. I was advised that mice and rats will be in our garden in a shot if there is rabbit or guinea pig food available 👎

Your craving is understandable but it would be a bone of contention and as such the pure joy it should bring would be spoiled. Wait until you are a few agent then you will be able to revel in it without sneery comments etc. Keep taking a step and you will get there, hang on in.

Focus your energies on getting out of this unhappy marriage. Start making plans for your new life, including having a dog then.

You need a dog like you need another hole in your head. You are in no position for getting a new dog. Personally, I don't think you should be getting any pets right now. Until you completely separate from your husband, your home life is going to be very challenging. Make your life easier, not harder. Pets will make it harder.

No

You will be more tied.

No not a good idea atm. How awful to be stuck with someone for the next 18 months in an unhappy relationship 😔

If it feels soul-destroying without one then take that seriously. You and the children may get lots of joy from having a dog around at a time when you are in a difficult place...(Mine is a real comfort.)

How awful that you have to stay in a loveless marriage for the next 18 months. I feel for you, but please don’t bring a dog into this messy situation. Dogs are highly sensitive to the moods of people around them and it wouldn’t be fair to bring one into a home where it was unwanted by someone it had to live with.