just found an old friend on facebook. think he expects a little more than just being mates though.

[mamazon]

basicly when i was a teenager i had a fantastic male friend. we went everywhere together and he was like the older brother i always wanted.

we lost touch when i met my ex as he didn't like the idea of male friends. we just slowly drifted apart.

well after almost 10 years i have found him again via facebook.
we have spoken almost non stop for the last week and i have arranged for him to come and visit next weekend.

now, the only problem is that i absolutly adore him. he is such a lovely guy and i would fix him up with any of my friends in a heartbeat....but i just dont feel that way about him myself.

trouble is he has always had a bit of a crush on me. i always ignored it before and acted as though i had no idea.
but its been clear during our conversations that for him nothing has changed, he would still very much like to take things further than friednship.

when i got in touch he said that he had a long distance relationship but t hat thigs were rocky.
next thing i know he has finished with her.

i am worried he has finished things in the hopes that we would get togther.

I know im sounding really big headed, but i just dont know how to handle this one.

i really want him to be part of my life again, but im not ready for a relationship with anyone....and certainly not one of my clostest friends.

you just have to tell him straight that you value his friendship too much and that you are just happy rekindiling that......nothing else,if he is as good a friend as you say he will understand hun

he might be gorgeous now or even think you are a troll, how many people spend years knowing someone before that click happens, just keep saying to him how nice it is that you are still friends after all this time and distance, and how great it will be that their is no pressure to be anything more than friends.

well i am dropping as many unsubtle hints as i can lol.

he has seen pics of me now and i have of him. to be honest apart from a few extra ounds i dont think either of us have changed at all.

which is part of the problem lol

and for reasons similar to this i canceled my facebook profile.

I think you're better off being clear and direct about it, dropping hints doesn't normally work a) with men generally b) with someone who has DECIDED romance is in the air.

You could say that you don't want to be at all presumptious, but that if he has any romantic intent at all in this reunion, you have to say now that you just don't, for whatever reasons blahblah etc.

Tell him that one of your friends thinks he is a hottie and then say she is single. Make sure you choose a friend that he is never likely to meet though!

well i was chatting with him on messenger and toldhim i had tracked down an old mutual friends whom i had dated briefly.

he was throwing a few hints that maybe i was interested in him and so i have answered that no. i have got in touch with lots of old friends and its been great catching up but that im not interested in a relationship with anyone.

so hopefully that will sink in.
i really want to avoid being too blunt as i would hate to offend him.

mamazon, sounds like a clear enough statement to me, it might be worth saying it a half a dozen more times though.