Please say it gets better?

[DeeDimer]

I've had a shit week. I found out on Monday that my 'D'H has been having an emotional affair/sex texting some random women he met (can you actually do that?) on Instagram. He's apparently admitted everything. Was developing feelings for her, things became juicy. I saw a message from him on Monday and after he lied and tried very hard to deny it, a couple of hours later it all came out.
He says it was a moment of madness (going on for a month) and he was already going to end it when I found out. Hearing the facts I suspect he was catfished.
I don't want to split up but I'm really struggling. I'm angry, sad, frightened and just can't imagine how my life will look.
Has anyone got over something like this? Will it ever be ok again?
Both in our 50's. Been married 7 years, 4 DC's, none together.

I'm so sorry to read your post , that's awful. It will be very hard to re-gain trust but if you're both willing to make it work you can. How could he have been catfished? He was obviously a willing participant in this , he's as much to blame as she is. To be fair to her though, she probably didn't even know he was married!
I'm so sorry though, it must have been a horrible shock for you

I'm sorry this has happened.

But he plainly wasn't going to end it, was he? He only confessed because you found out! Who knows how long he'd have messaged her if you hadn't found out?

I'd take some time to think about what you want.

Is this the first time he's been unfaithful?

I don’t think he was “about to end it”. That’s what everyone says when they are caught. And how i doubt he was catfishes, he’s making excuses.

I gave a cheater a second chance and I experienced so much anxiety. I could never full trust him, every day I would ask him if he made contact with her. And then I caught him again after he promised never to do it again and that was it for me.

If you can put it behind you and put absolute trust into him you can probably move past it. I couldn’t.

Going on for a month is not a moment of madness.