What is most important to you in a relationship to you ?

[Emmie12345]

Mine are :

Love
Intimacy
Urge to protect the other

What if the things you value aren’t valued in same way by your partner?

Trusting, without it then the relationship just will not work for me

Trust for me too

Kindness
Trust
Integrity

Effort. Action not words

Love
Trust
Affection
Humor
Non sexual intimacy

I’m seeing someone now off and on and he doesn’t meet all these and it’s a struggle.

He’s more pragmatic and doesn’t really care about love. He thinks as long as two people have great sex and there’s no drama that’s enough to make a good relationship.

No shared children.

Life is so much better without young children.

Trust.
Non-sexual intimacy.
Respecting each others boundaries - Especially if we are having a row.

Trust
Intimacy (not necessarily sexual)
Good communication
Being able to form a good relationship with my son

Mine has definitely changed over time. What I thought was important in my relationship before DC is much more different now.

So, with that in mind I would probably say fidelity, loyalty and a willingness to communicate. These are what saved our marriage in a very rough patch.

Trust
Attraction
Humour

The above equates to love for both me & the Mr.

If you don't find them hot and you don't make each other laugh can't see the point basically.

Trust, respect, honesty and loyalty.

I don’t see how I could ever be in a relationship with someone I didn’t respect or trust.

A similar level of intellectual and emotional intelligence shared by both people in the relationship. I've dated someone far less emotionally intelligent and far more intellectually intelligent than me and I personally found both scenarios to be difficult.

Kindness.
Empathy.
Trust.

Trust ✅
Respect ✅
Mutual Attraction ✅
Both wanting the same thing from life and working together to build it and enjoying each other’s company. We are each other’s best friends but sometimes we do get on each other’s nerves 😬

Attraction and really good sex
Mutual support
Effortless communication
Humour
Just being able to “be” in each other’s company

Willingness to communicate even when times are really really tough is imperative. No damaging addictions. Honesty. Not a social media addict. Normal, balanced, reasonable hobbies. Prioritises family. Respect for other people’s feelings. Some kind of moral social code eg doesn’t throw litter out of car windows. No road rage.

Communication is the biggest. My marriage doesn’t have that and it’s struggling

Kindness.

Everything flows from it in a relationship.

The longer I am married, the more I admire and respect my husband for his kindness to me always.

Trust and humour. There is nothing I like more than getting the giggles o full out laughing with Dp at something hilarious.

I couldn’t be in a relationship where we couldn’t be silly and take the piss sometimes.

Compatibility - in values, sex, goals and personalities
Trust
Intimacy
Laughter
Mutual valuing
Autonomy

In terms of what both people value I guess it depends on what those values are. For me, some are non-negotiable, like say valuing honesty and integrity, being kind and being appropriately generous in life.

If political or social values don’t match it can be really tough going. What do you do OP if your values misalign?

Oh god! Yes political views and values are so so important. They have to align, even if they don’t entirely match.

Kindness
Reliability
Chemistry

@TeddyIsaHe

Oh god! Yes political views and values are so so important. They have to align, even if they don’t entirely match.

And this. God yes, this.

Respect, kindness, teamwork, appreciation, humour.

If I had to pick one then respect. Without respect you will struggle to get the rest. By respect I'm talking about respect for differences, respect for boundaries, respect for effort, respect for everything. A relationship without respect is doomed to fail.

Trust
Selflessness
Responsible
Kind

It used to be
Fit
Rich 😂