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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Contact with other parent ? Any advice ? Support groups ?

2 replies

anon2334 · 22/10/2020 19:27

AIBU to be very upset and disappointment that my 3 year old comes back from his dad saying ‘ I’m going to live with dad’? I say oh ok that’s nice and move on , my eldest said he says it him and she can hear my ex saying it to our son. I fled abusive relationship, emotionally and he tried to destroy my emotionally and said he would hve the Kids and I wouldn’t get them. There is a history of parental alienation in his family so bad that my ex was violent towards his real dad who didn’t do any of the things his mum said. Some of his family realised and left and keep away because now they look back they know the mum destroyed their relationship with dad. Now I’ve been told he is becoming more like his mum. I can only carry and just do what I’m doing but I think he will up his abuse soon, it’s only been 6 months since court order. He will try and turn my kids , the only one he will not succeed with his my eldest because she remembers what’s happened and we are close. I don’t talk bad about him, I try and be positive , never miss contact and never will but I know I’m on the road to more sadness. My ex is far more financially stable, manipulative, can play the part well and even told me everyone thinks he is lovely and innocent but they don’t know the real him and he would laugh. I can tell you that when I met him he was Perfect but when he turned if you dare say anything and it wouldn’t even be that bad he would literally rip into me. The tears I had and yet so loyal. He tried to turn my own friends against me. Used everything he done to me and kids and said it was me in court. I need some support group of dealing with men like this and parenting amicably for the good of the kids. I know one day they can make their own minds up but For now I don’t know

OP posts:
Hesfamousforit · 22/10/2020 20:34

I don't know the answers but I sympathise.
I'm feeling utterly shit about my own problems with ex and parenting.
Flowers

anon2334 · 22/10/2020 21:39

I know , it’s so hard. Have no idea how to deal with it except ignore and pray he has a change of heart and we can parent amicably. I just want my children to be happy with both parents and move on. In an ideal world

OP posts:
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