What to do about this with MIL?

[Cookiecrumbles2020]

Last week my ex husband managed to manipulate me into taking my baby to his mother’s house. She hasn’t seen or had contact with me or my baby since February. My ex demanded he take her to see his mother in her house for 10 mins so I waited outside in the car. Time was passing so I knocked the door and said baby needs to come home now. Ex MIL said are you not coming in and I said are you joking (I have serious issues with her and she is partly to blame for the breakdown of my marriage). She slammed the door and locked it with me standing outside and my baby in the house. I ran to the car to call the police and a few seconds later she shouted that baby was coming. My ex went mad at me for being so angry with her but I don’t believe I was wrong to be mad, it felt very threatening. AIBU? I firmly believe he should have sided with me, it was an awful way to behave.

After that stunt I’d take contact with the baby off the table. What’s your arrangement with your ex? How old is the baby?

Solicitor arrangement is supervised visits with me at me home. Baby has just turned one.

Well she has certainly fucked up any goodwill you might have found regarding your little one and her outrageous behaviour. NO contact at all going forward would be my starting point. You dont need the hassle OP and she is obviously unhinged in her actions and therefor untrustworthy regarding you and your little one. I would also stipulate if you can that your ex cannot take little one there either if at all posssible.

Easy one, no more contact with ex mil. I would have panicked as well, it is terrifying to have someone block you from your baby. Try not to let this get you down, if contact with ex partner is supervised just keep it that way and don't do him or his family any more favours.

Didn't you post this in AIBU too?

@sapnupuas I did in error, I only use relationships section.

@carbhunter I was terrified at the door being locked

Unfortunately my ex lives with her which I think will cause a major problem and worry for me

Ask your solicitor for advice, a deliberately cruel stunt aimed at hurting you

Well from now on you stick to the visitation plan, at your house under your supervision and his Mum doesn't get to see her Grandchild.

She did this to herself, you did absolutely the right thing, it maybe her house but it's your child.

I just have this sick fear that my ex will get unsupervised access when he takes me to court. I cannot sleep at night worrying about how I will let my baby go to these people.

Do not give in to his nonsense. The court order says supervised visits to your home? So stick to that. Why would you let him take her to see his mother, who has zero rights?

Make a record of the incident - email him describing it and tell him that this was not okay. Could be needed as evidence in future.

There is no court order, only an agreement between our solicitors (which I suspect he agreed to make himself look like he was willing to be flexible with arrangements in front of a judge). He is starting court proceedings, I am terrified about my baby going to him and his mother’s

Good idea about the email I will do that

Is there a safe guarding reason why you are insisting that your ex has supervised contact only?

He has a problem with alcohol abuse, filling vodka bottles with water, stashing empties round the house, in the car, in the baby’s room. He cannot be trusted.

OP, do you have the alcohol abuse documented? That would be useful if so.

Yes there is photo evidence of the alcohol and a police report was filed

He breached the agreement. That wasn't a supervised visit with you present. Get it court ordered.