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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Marriage advice

7 replies

mamatothebest · 21/10/2020 11:14

Hi everyone so long story so bare with me please. I need advice.

I have been with my now husband since November 2017.

December 2017.. he didn't have money for a Christmas present for me but paid a transsexual man £30 for explicit videos..

Nothing all of 2018

2019.. he starts working away..
January to March.. downloads tinder, badoo and many similar sites.

Alongside, adding gay men on Snapchat and telling them is exact location. Exchanging intimate pics etc etc.

He says he's never ever met any of these people it was always just the conversation however.

He was doing that jan-March but bought my engagement ring in the April, proposed in the May.

July, he's away for work again and does the same again, dating sites etc.

At this point I know nothing of what's went on in 2019 or what he's been doing.

We married and found out I was pregnant in the September.

Fast forward to yesterday I've discovered after being on his phone all that he was up to in 2019.

Advice on what to do? How to handle it?

Sorry if it doesn't make sense I'm trying to cut a long story short.

TIA

OP posts:
litterbird · 21/10/2020 18:14

Errmmmm.....not sure why you stayed after you found out almost straight after the wedding? Are you happy to have him do these things? Still unsure what you are asking here? You should be getting your ducks in a row and getting out asap. However, after what you have seen and you have decided to stay I am sure some of the MN ladies who have experience with this will be along shortly to help you out with what your husband is in to.

Princessposie · 21/10/2020 18:17

OP, why on earth did you stay with him, marry him and have a DC Shock

MissConductUS · 21/10/2020 18:19

He is sexually attracted to men and you are his "beard" as they say. He's also lied to you continuously. Guys don't exchange pictures of their dicks in routine, blokey conversations.

Get organized and get out. There is no saving this marriage.

ABCDay · 21/10/2020 18:20

What to do? Get yourself a shit hot lawyer and make sure you live the best life for you and your baby without this liar.

Also get an STD check.

Strangedays20 · 21/10/2020 18:22

Did you know what he was doing in December 2017 when you didn’t get a Christmas present?

Aquamarine1029 · 21/10/2020 18:25

Did you know about any of this before you got married?

kmppliot · 29/03/2023 20:34

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