I suspect I'm being a bit ridiculous?

[PoppinMary]

I'm a bit insecure at the moment. Not sure why all of a sudden but imagine it's a lot to do with being pregnant, I am feeling pretty fat and blgggh most of the time. I just don't feel very nice about myself right now.

Anyway... Something happened yesterday which made me feel a bit funny and I think I'm overreacting but still.

My husband works with a friend. This friend had told my husband that a girl had messaged him on social media and he was excited about it basically because she is 'hot' etc etc... Basically his mates were teasing him about it.

My husband and I share a social media account, not for anything weird, just because we run a business through it so we both have to have access to reply to messages.

I notice that a friend request had been accepted by some woman that I don't know and a message had been sent to her from my husband basically saying 'X is all excited because you've been messaging him haha' (so it's this woman his friend has been speaking to) and she's replied just laughing basically and then telling DH that she loves the work he does (on our page). So nothing bad.

I asked DH who she was when the friend request was accepted as we don't usually send them to people we don't know, we have people who follow us because if the business but we don't usually follow others unless we know them.

When I asked he told me about it very openly and said he was just teasing X about a new girl he's speaking to because he's been going on about her at work.

I don't know, it just makes me feel weird. Like why would you do that? If my friend was talking to a guy, I wouldn't add him and try and start a conversation up. I've looked at her pictures admittedly and she's pretty. Makes me wonder if that is why.

But then equally he'd have to be a fucking idiot to do anything on the account where he knows full well I read messages all day and he wasn't secretive when I asked.

I'm ashamed to say I've deleted her and the messages now so if he wanted to message again he'd have to actively seek to do so again and I'd know it wasn't just a one off message to wind his mate up

I'm not usually like this. I just feel horrible about myself at the minute.

Bless you op it's easy to read too much into things when you're feeling bad about yourself. During lockdown I've put on weight, not had a haircut, let myself go to all intents and purposes and I've found myself getting a little more insecure too.

This does sound pretty innocent though. Very childish but innocent. Perhaps your dp is a little jealous of the attention his friend is getting. Or maybe he wanted in on the 'banter'. But like you said he'd have to be pretty stupid to do anything dodgy from a joint account...he'd set up something private surely?

He will probably ask you why you've deleted her. Be honest and explain that you trust him but it made you feel uneasy and was also very immature. His reaction will tell you a lot. If he just shrugs it off it's a non issue.

Thank you. I know you're right and you know I do actually trust him, he's a good man, we're happy, he's never given me reason to worry, he's so open with everything, use each others phones all the time, always given me passwords to his stuff (for business but also uses them as his personal accounts).

I don't know why it got to me so much. I just feel like a bit of a useless frump at the minute.

I think it sounds a bit odd OP. And now you've basically pushed it underground so if he does message again, he'll be avoiding you knowing. If you can reinstate the messages I would do that to keep an eye on it. Your spidey senses are tingling...perhaps quite rightly.

@Manxiety

I think it sounds a bit odd OP. And now you've basically pushed it underground so if he does message again, he'll be avoiding you knowing. If you can reinstate the messages I would do that to keep an eye on it. Your spidey senses are tingling...perhaps quite rightly.

Nice, let’s respond to a pregnant woman and worry her even more..

Op, cmon, you know he was open about this, it’s no biggie.

It's hard when you're pregnant. It's a very emotional, scary time and there's no getting away from it. Go easy on yourself. Let yourself feel whatever you feel.

I dont think it's anything to worry about at all. It sounds as if he added her as a friend on social media so that he could tell the woman that his friend thought she was hot - a bit playground - "my friend likes you heehee" kind of thing. Maybe he thought he was playing matchmaker - in a bit of a childish teasing way admittedly but harmless I would say.

He probably added her because she's hot unfortunately but I don't think it's anymore than that as he added her on a shared account. Sometimes men just don't think about the impact on the oh.