So, I started talking to this guy online not too long ago - we got on immediately, had a great connection, talked all day every day as much as we could. We've met up a few times. Each time the date goes like something out of a film, all we do is laugh and cuddle and kiss and it feels like I could really fall for him.
However, he revealed over text he was only out of a four year relationship six months earlier. And that while he's over it "romantically", he's not over the loss of the friendship. He said that won't get in the way of this. And that he has no urge to get back with her. And that he broke it off with her and that "devastated her" and he'd only recently felt "good enough to get back on the dating scene".
Anyway, last time I meet him, things are getting a bit hot and heavy and I think we're going to have sex but... nope, he doesn't even (TMI coming) have the... necessary standing equipment to proceed...
He says it's just too soon. I said do you feel guilty about moving on. He hesitated. It totally killed the mood. Obviously. This happened several times. He'd become a bit... excited, and then go right down again quick as it happened. I tried not to take it personally but this has never happened to me before, and it was pretty demoralising.
I've since asked him.. over the phone... if this is connected to the ex. After some back and forth he clarified, that the feeling is like having a "dead dog" inside him. He doesn't want to resurrect zombie dog. But there's a deep pit of sadness about it. "I really like you, want to see you again, we have such a connection etc etc". "I don't miss her, but I do care about her a lot as a person"... "I'm grieving the loss of the friendship".
While he says he has no plans to get back with her, this is still in his mind.
I really like him. But I don't see this working. It hurts, honestly. A lot.
What would you do?