Been seeing my boyfriend for a year. It started off great - always does, right?
In the beginning he was very affectionate and loving. Seemed to want the same things
He was clearly very attracted. Without wanting to sound arrogant, most men are and I find it annoying - the unwanted attention for how I look, rather than who I am. Bring on old age so I won’t have to deal with over excited men in the workplace or on the street 
Anyway I have mentioned this only because while my boyfriend was very clearly attracted, he wasn’t sure if he would find my body attractive. I was a size 10 with a tiny belly from bloating due to food intolerance and not going to the gym as regularly as I used to.
We had sex and everything seemed fine. He told me he loved me and things were going well.
When lockdown happened, he suddenly announced that he never found my body attractive, and he wanted to break up.
Shortly afterwards he said he didn’t know what he was doing. We made up, he reassured me he found me attractive and I said I would workout more, as I knew I put on some weight.
However we have had sex only a few times since then and he’s admitted to finding my face beautiful but can’t find my body attractive in the way it is.
I’m a size10-12 and my BMI is healthy. I could do with losing a tiny amount of weight and toning up though.
I can’t accept that I’m too fat or untoned for my bf to sleep with me and I refuse to have sex anyway.
He was a virgin until his 30s and admitted to only enjoying sex with one woman. He’s in his 40s now.
I suspect he has aspergers- so have other people in his family and ex gfs. I’ve also read many people with aspergers end up in sexless relationships.
He said not long ago that we need to acceptwe won’t have good sex in the near future, although we may do in the distant future. And that he loves me and wants to be with me. And we could procreate to have children.
Even if I develop the body he finds attractive, I’m not sure I can bring myself to have sex with him after this.
Has anyone experienced anything like this?
I’m just dreading having to start over again and meet someone new. Late 30s - it’s getting really tiring now and the dating apps are horrendous. Not many other ways of meeting men at the mo.
Maybe this is why it’s taking me so long to end a relationship that clearly isn’t working.
Or can it be salvaged in some way?