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Original poster

Bad teeth, turn off?

40 replies

Spud91 · 05/10/2020 15:53

I feel like I’m being massively shallow Blush

Been on a couple of dates with someone, he’s lovely, kind and generous. Has treated me well both times..... but he has bad teeth.

We met OLD and all the photos I’ve seen of him he’s smiling with his mouth closed. He has two crooked teeth at the front, two pushed back and then two coming out of the gums inbetween these.

I feel like this is something that is going to put me off him, but is it stupid to give up on something which could be good for such a superficial reason??

OP posts:
Otterhound · 05/10/2020 17:36

Dbml - i wasnt born with them sadly And despite having wealthy parents they never saw the need to get them fixed when it would have been cheaper/free.

But luckily my good looks and dazzling personality more than makes up for below par teeth!

EarthSight · 05/10/2020 17:41

@Spud91

I feel like I’m being massively shallow Blush

Been on a couple of dates with someone, he’s lovely, kind and generous. Has treated me well both times..... but he has bad teeth.

We met OLD and all the photos I’ve seen of him he’s smiling with his mouth closed. He has two crooked teeth at the front, two pushed back and then two coming out of the gums inbetween these.

I feel like this is something that is going to put me off him, but is it stupid to give up on something which could be good for such a superficial reason??

No - these little things are quite important, especially if they're affecting you like this. If they're bothering you like this now, how are you going to feel about kissing him? How about in a decade's time? Everyone's different and that's ok. It's just depends how bad they are and what his general smile is like. You can have lovely teeth but have a smile that's not very attractive.
DBML · 05/10/2020 17:49

@Otterhound

Perfect response 👌 I love it!

Glitterb · 05/10/2020 20:28

Sounds like you have got the ick....unlikely to change this early on!

JaggySplinter · 05/10/2020 20:37

You can't really help what you find attractive and what you don't. It probably seems shallow, but I find even moderately overweight people unattractive. I'm not bothered about hair (long/short/none) but I hate beards. I don't care how tall someone is, but I don't feel attracted to anyone that's fat. It's a feel thing as my ch as anything. Bad teeth put me off kissing someone.

I'm sure that plenty of people disagree with my taste. And plenty of people would find me unattractive (I'm quite alternative in dress sense etc). Each to their own.

Whattodo914 · 05/10/2020 20:38

Bad breath would put me off too. You’re not attracted to him, so move on and find someone you are attracted to.

ilikemethewayiam · 05/10/2020 20:54

I started dating a guy in my late 40’s, he was a bit older than me. He was actually a really nice man. Very polite respectful and courteous. His teeth weren’t perfectly straight but were a bit yellow and slightly stained. I deliberately brought up the the fact that I go to the hygienist every 3 months for descaling and he then told me he hadn’t been near a dentist since he was 16! 🤮. The thought of his mouth coming anywhere near mine made me heave! I finished with him the next day. I don’t mind if they are not perfectly straight but yellow, stained and full of plaque is a no no. If that turns you off OP and you can’t get passed it, then move on. Don’t waste his time or yours.

Chicchicchicchiclana · 05/10/2020 20:57

It's obviously a personal thing but I agree OP - bad teeth are a terrible turn off. Even if they are crooked rather than uncared for there is so much you can do to get them sorted out as an adult nowadays.

Meuniere · 05/10/2020 21:06

@Spud91

I don’t feel quite so bad after some of the comments!

I think if he wanted to get them fixed he would have done it when he was younger? I had quite crooked teeth and wore braces as a teenager. He’s the same age as me (mid 30s) and I had free dentistry to get them fixed. Now he’d have to pay for it, it’d take more for him to fix it, I don’t know if he would. I don’t feel like it’s something I could ask him either without offending him.

Except you don’t know what was going on at that time for him. Incl not having parents that bothered taking him to have braces.

I am older than you/him. I vaguely had braces, that the dentist broke by going to fast. I hated them. My mum never pushed the issue more.
So now my teeth are misaligned.

It might well not have anything to do with him.

cheezy · 05/10/2020 21:08

Craggy teeth is very different to mouldy unkept teeth. His sound quite interesting.

Original poster
Spud91 · 05/10/2020 21:14

You’re right, I don’t know what was going on for him to not have had them fixed. He always keeps his mouth closed in photos so I think he must feel a bit self conscious about it too.

@JaggySplinter he is overweight and has a beard Grin I like that about him.

I do find him attractive. But you’re right if that’s something that’s bothering me I should let him go.

OP posts:
hollieberrie · 05/10/2020 21:32

Teeth don't put me off at all but bad fashion really does. I can't get past it. So I understand!

rainydayslover · 05/10/2020 21:44

Teeth is important to me as well op and it's not being shallow. You need to fancy them first to pursue a second, third date. I went on a date with a guy once who had teeth like your date and he decided to eat creamed spinach. The spinach got all stuck on his teeth and I tried to imagine myself trying to kiss him and the thought of it made me sick. I'm thankfully married to a man who has naturally Pearl like teeth and he takes very good care of them 😬

Zippea · 05/10/2020 21:53

I think it is shallow but I’d want to find out more.
My DH has terrible teeth. He was born with significant overcrowding and had teeth removed, extensive braces etc and when the braces came off the teeth went back the other way. He continued to visit the dentist and hygienist twice yearly and did everything they told him to - to no improvement.

He moves down south in 90s and finds a new dentist - the new dentist took one look at his mouth and asked he if wanted to sue his dentist.

He has tried so much at great cost and pain and it does embarrass him. He has fantastic oral hygiene

When I met him, I wanted to know more about him and his teeth didn’t even factor into anything for me (unless you count the weird grimacing to hide his teeth in the wedding photos!).

If you aren’t attracted to him then fair enough but don’t let his teeth put you off. There may be more to him than just bad teeth

RedRosie · 05/10/2020 21:55

Are they clean and is his breath ok? If so, and it's just that his teeth are a bit crazy/wonky/higgledy-piggledy then I would probably give it a chance. You say "lovely, kind and generous?" All that sounds good to me and I wouldn't discount them.

Only you know how you feel of course.

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