Would you let your MIL and SIL question your role as a mother and let them get away with it? Let alone sit and slag your family off in front off you? I am so Cross, Angry upset and feel totally sick about the whole thing and don't know what to do next.
We went out for a meal with all DH family on Saturday and it turned into a war zone. Although the meal itself wasn't too bad but when we got back to PIL things turned really nasty. Mil had looked after DS 22mths on thursday while I went out with my sister. When we came back DS scribbled on the window and my sis said 'No don't do that. Which I think was fine as he keeps scribbling on things I was walking back in the room and she didn't raise her voice. Then MIL went to make cup of tea and ds started playing with the cupboard under the sink taking bleach, washing up liquid out. MIL didn't say anything as usual and sister saw him and said no poison come away again in a way I found acceptable. Anyway MIL in law came out on sat night and said your sister should not tell * no in my house if I want him to do those things then I will let him???
Explained that I didn't think she was right and that DS had to learn the word No for his own sake. She snipped back well that doesn't surprise me with your parenting skills and he's my GS so I'll do what I want your problem is you listen to your family too much. FFS
I was not going to argue back but when she slagged my family off who have done nothing but be understanding, welcoming ect to her then I said he was my son and if I want him to learn right from wrong then i will. She then started to cry and say i didn't understand, I walked off into kitchen and SIL followed she normally agrees that MIl is overbearing and that we should not let her become obsessed with DS. I was then told by SIL 'you don't understand what this family have been through the last 3 years. Well, thank god I don't know totally what they have been through as she wasn't my sis but I loved her and have given them all, all the support, love, praticle help, ect I could. I said I agree I don't fully understand but I've been three for them all SIL said get out of this house. I know she had, had drink but I didn't deserve that. MIL then started shouting about me and my family and how she would let ds do what he wanted afetr all my nieces and nephews were all little s*s!. So I turned round and said fine you won't see ds again if your going to be like that.
DH and myself argued when we came home (ds was at my sister in questions having a whale of a time, thank god) We've been trying to sort it out and we've said we will not let her split us up) I have said I will never talk to her again and she can see ds On my terms not just dropping in when she wants, infact I don't want her in my house.
I know she has never really liked me I was never good enough for her, mind you her own kids were never good enough for her either. She has always been nasty to me especially when she has had a glass of wine e.g. telling Dh everyone would understand if he never married me (on our wedding day), after trying to conceive on our 2nd IUI attempt said to me infront of both SIL's "well you don't know what it's like for me you not having kids, walking down our rd trying to think of excuses, it's worse for than it is for you. FFS tell people if they ask I've got nothing to be ashamed off. I never confronted her about that and there have been equally nasty things said since.
Do you think It can work with dh if I don't see his mother again, I have felt sick and upset all day not for what I said because I told the truth but that she obviously thinks Im a crap mom and I try my best I just want him to learn right from wrong I know he's only a baby and may be the only one I have but if he is let to get away with things at there house then he will not understand that he can't do it at other peoples.
Sorry to rant needed to get it off my chest, will now go and stop crying and calm down.