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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Is he being unreasonable

8 replies

Sunflower1970 · 29/09/2020 21:55

Ever since I remained working from home and my husband went back to work full time he has been sniping and bitching about stuff around the house that he thinks ought to be done. He has no concept that working from home doesn’t allow me to clean the shower, weed the Garden and do all the jobs he can’t be arsed to do. He has completely withdrawn from any chores now he’s back as I’m ‘at home all day’ This has left me stressed and anxious in case I’m judged when he gets home about all the things I haven’t done when he gets home. We’re not currently speaking after I hadn’t brought the recycling bins in!!! Any thoughts?

OP posts:
Aquamarine1029 · 29/09/2020 21:59

Your husband is an idiot. My husband works from home fulltime now, and had done a couple of days a week for many years. When he is working, he is working. He has a very senior, full-on position that never lets up during the day. He can't do any housework or dyi during working hours, and I understand it completely.

AnneLovesGilbert · 29/09/2020 21:59

Yes of course he is.

SundayAgain · 29/09/2020 22:01

My DP isn't as bad as yours but close in that he has stepped back from doing chores. He doesn't pick that they haven't been done but he just leaves them now for me to do. I go to bed laster than him, get up earlier, deal with the school runs, homework, reading, clubs, chores and work 8 hrs a day.

The only thing he does is cook witch he doesn't do that every night so I end up eating by myself whilst he goes to bed.

Sexnotgender · 29/09/2020 22:09

Is he hard of thinking?

mbosnz · 29/09/2020 22:27

You are working from home. You are not a stay at home partner/parent. For all the hours he's being paid to work outside the home, your company is paying you to work - at your home.

So, no, sorry, buddy, you haven't got your stay at home drudge that you've clearly been fantasising about.

TwentyViginti · 29/09/2020 22:31

Fucking hell - he won't even bring the bins in? Why are you with this entitled twat?

OoohTheStatsDontLie · 29/09/2020 22:38

What diea he say when you ask him.how you're meant to do every single thing and fit in 8 hours work in the 9 hours (or whatever) he is out of the house every day?

I'm not sure what to say, I don't honestly think there is much hope when someone doesnt understand the different between someone who is a housewife by mutual agreement and someone who's office is in their kitchen for a while but otherwise does a full time job. If he really doesn't get it then he is too stupid to reason with

Sunflower1970 · 29/09/2020 23:27

Thanks for all your great comments. Really appreciate it ladies xxx

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