Since lockdown I've realised I may be in an abusive relationship and not quite sure what to do.
The more I think about things, the more I realise what he's been doing;
I have no friends, none, everyone I've had, he's found fault in or made me think they're not good for me or just made my life misery whenever I've wanted to go somewhere so I just stopped going out. I remember wanting to go to work & him telling me that he wouldn't help me with the kids at all, so I had to choose. I didn't choose, I got a school time job but he hated it and at the time wasn't working but wasn't doing anything to help me either.
If he doesn't get sex on a Saturday morning, is absolutely horrible to be around, will bang stuff around, shout & just act like a sulky child...so most of the time I do it for an easy home for the kids.
I know I have to end it but doing so is going to try so hard....he won't just leave if I asked him to, he'll get angry and aggressive, will accuse me of having another man, try to take my youngest girl, wreck/break the house or hurt me. I have to figure out how to get him out & stay safe without having to run from our home.
I know I have to end it, for me and my kids....I don't know how long this has been going on but Friday night something clicked and I realised what's happening. He always makes everything about him, screams over & at me, tells me I'm being stupid/a div/overreacting....he's got a drink problem too and I've finally realised its not okay for the kids or me to live this way.
I suffer from Bipolar type 2, agoraphobia and severe depressive episodes, on Friday I was in a really bad way, needed to go to A&E but he wouldn't let me go, instead told me to stop being a miserable c**t and to get over my mental health. He made it clear he doesn't care about my mental health and that he doesn't support me the way he should be as my partner.
This sent me into a massive spiral and I finally realised I have to end things.
I guess the point of my post is, verifying to myself that this is an abusive relationship, because as I write this, I can see it is, but also for advice on how I can end the relationship safely, without having to leave my home. My oldest daughters are doing their GCSE'S next yr & have changed secondary school 4 times since yr 7 so I really don't want to uproot them again.
I AM going to end it, I DON'T want to live this way anymore, I just need the right advice on how to do it right and forever.
Thanks for sticking with me through the post xx