What do you do together (DP/DH) that makes you feel connected?

[picklerecipe]

Just wondering what others do in their relationship that makes them feel connect to their partner? Anything even small like cooking together, a hobby, a chat after a long day but a time when you actually feel connected.

We sit down every Saturday morning with a cup of coffee and a pile of cookery books and plan the week's meals.

We go for walks in the countryside. Church crawling. Plan outings together. He paints and he always comes in and shows me what he's done even if it's a complete failure. Sit in the garden together.

Discuss total arseholes on Twitter/Facebook etc- a lot of politics

every night after work we have a 'catch up' in the garden or sometimes we sit on the bed (bedroom has a lovely view) before we make dinner.
We always have a series on the go that we enjoy watching together
Bike rides
We often take our books to a lovely coffee shop and sit and read together
Definitely cuddling in bed

Swimming is a really bonding thing as well

also, we keep in regular contact, not overwhelming but little texts when one has been gone for a few hours

all little things that help each other know you are always thinking of them

Go to bed at the same time and cuddle a lot
Lots of contact in the day
Chat about any old mundane bollocks and send loads of GIFs etc
And sex not the quantity but the quality.

We have an AA book of walks, all across the country, its out of date and sometimes we get lost, if one of us has something our our minds, by the end of a 6 mile walk its forgotten, and we are happy and exhausted- we take a picnic and eat it during the walk..

We garden together, doing little things to make the garden nice really brings us closer together, again being exhausted afterward is great.

Jump in the bath together occasionally..

We get into a series on netflix etc and make time to watch together

Playing simple board games or dominos with DC

Getting a take away and an 'early night' which usually means TV on in bed until one of us falls asleep.

Leaving little notes when one of us goes out before the other in the morning

Have a few too many drinks and listening to music - although been trying to distance ourselves from this one when it became too regular- being mutually hungover when we have no DC and watching old TV series/films.

Convinced DP to do some pamper sessions (ex army so not his thing) foot peel masks have been mutually disgusting and funny.

...dont get me wrong, its not all sunshine and rainbows, but so many little things you can do that really help!

Oh I second PP who said early nights too. Making sure you go to bed at the same or similar time really changed things for us!

Oh and also, camping! Learning the art of packing and unpacking a car/tent and being organised is great, we have it down to a T now. Despite a few mistrails. Extra points for camping in the rain/wind/with exhausted DCs!

Go out on his motorbike

I walk down to the train station to meet him after work so we can have a first kiss, a slow walk and chat before we make tea together etc. He also texts me daft jokes during the day and I send him stupid memes and gifs. We've been together for 13 years and I'd say we're more connected than ever

I guess I hadn’t consciously thought about it before.

He goes to bed quite a bit earlier than me, I go to bed with him, have a snuggle, chat etc and once he is asleep I either get out of bed or read, go on my phone etc until I want to sleep. I don’t like the idea of him going to bed alone.

We have different hobbies that the other isn’t a huge fan of, but where I can I watch him play football and he is yet to miss a single rugby match.

He can’t access computer games that aren’t played with a keyboard, he likes Zelda so we play it by me being the controls and he takes the role of the brains of the operation.

Being physically close, I don’t mean sex, things like cuddles etc and general physical intimacy.

We walk together for an hour every day after dinner while the kids are watching tv, and have sex!

Aside from raise DC. And sex.

We chat. A lot. About anything and everything.

Always cuddle in bed at night.

Pop in on each other in the bath and loofah each other's backs.

Play silly video games together. (Recommend Human Fall Flat and Totally reliable delivery service)

Have occasional date days when school is in. (Or just tell people that's what we're doing and spend the day in bed)

Communicate via memes

Shared baths too.
I make him tea twice a day. (I'm too controlling to let him make mine!)
We run fitness classes together - making little digs at each other as we do.
It's a tradition that while he wraps my birthday and Christmas presents, I'm blindfolded and by his side. (My favourite activity!)
He reads to me at bedtime.

Hadn't thought about this as such, but actually loads of small things make us feel connected.

Chatting/offloading after work. Making tea together. Walking ddog. Playing cards and drinking wine. Taking the piss out of each other and everything else. Motorbiking. A hug and kiss when one of us enters or leaves the house. Lots of little things!

We go for a long walk together every weekend where we chat about our week, moan about work, make plans, etc. We get a coffee from the nice independent cafe and head for the woods - it's our proper time to chat and put the world to rights.

We never leave the house without giving the other one a kiss goodbye, or a kiss hello when we get back.

When one of us is making dinner, the other one sits on the kitchen worktops to chat and keep company.

We spend a lot of time texting each other inane crap about our day and ranting about stuff we've seen on twitter. We have very similar political views so spend a lot of time discussing Brexit/Covid/whatever other shit the govt is pulling this week.

We hold hands in bed, every night.

Wow this thread has really opened my eyes...

Dh and I have separate rooms.
Go to bed at different times.
We watch tv in separate lounges in the evening.
Go days/weeks without texts.
Don't share hobbies.
Don't share friends.
Don't kiss or cuddle.
Have sex about 4 times a year but mechanically.
Last went out the two of us August 2019.
Last went away the two of us June 2018.
We talk about the children.
We do things with the children.
We argue about everything.

I'm 32, he's 40. Together 9 years.

The word "snuggles" is making me want to vomit.

Sorry. As you were.

That sounds really sad @dippyegg32. Are there any positives? Are you happy with how things are?

screaming at the news on the radio in unison

Yeah, that's us. We love a good rant. Fair amount to rant about these days too. Used to scare the kids, thought we were arguing!

Bike rides together, walking the dog. Just an evening to ourselves when my kids are at their Dads and we cook together and chill in front of the TV. I found even sitting together on one sofa rather than us both bring on separate sofas helped enormously.

We had one of those inflatable hot tubs in the shed that we bought years ago for the kids to mess about in. When kick down started we set it up and left it to continually. The kids barely bother with it but we use it most days even if it's just half an hour and we feel much closer. I think it's a matter of not having phones/TVs etc and we are in a smallish space and have to actually talk. After 5 months we gave the hot tub to my sisters kids and bought a better one. We actually have meaningful conversations for much longer than we did before lock down. We probably spend 3-5 hours a week just chatting like we did when we first met. The plus side is that it's really increased my sex drive as I feel more connected to him. We were definitely foundering a bit before hand.

And no, we don't shag in the sex pond 😂

Talking and listening to music together
We both have an artistic hobby (though different) and sit in same room to do it
Sex, cuddles, naughty comments
Going away to different towns and cities for weekends

I'd like to cook together but he hates that and likes to cook alone