Just that.
Been with DP over 4 years, one DD and on SD. It's never been brilliant between us but at least in the early days there was a 'spark'. Now I feel nothing. I like him, I care for him and I dont wish anything bad upon him but the thought of spending another year together, let alone the rest of our lives together makes me want to cry.
We've had a lot of financial issues (hes a recovering gambling addict) and now were finally in a position where we are financially comfortable but I'm still not happy. The money and nice things, shopping trips etc are great and i thought maybe one the money worries eased I'd start to love him again but I havnt.
There have been issues with SD and with her mum occasionally, less so recently but I feel like the past has taken its toll. I dont enjoy SDs company, her behaviour is generally rude and entitled. Neither DP or her mum do much about it, DP works full time so bare the brunt of it. We do things together, shopping, baking, crafts but I just dont like it anymore. I sound awful but I cant change how I feel about it and trust me I've tried.
DP is dull and boring, he doesn't really have friends or even hobbies so he has nothing to talk about. He doesn't seem to be able to hold down a job, grass is always greener, so he never really makes friends at work. When ever we go anywhere in the car we just drive in silence as he has nothing to say, either that or I just talk and he doe the obligatory 'ye' or what ever at the appropriate moment. The knock on effect is I hate going for days out with him as we just drive there in silence, walk around I'm silence, drive home in silence.
Hes not some awful guy, but deep down I think I know the issues are beyond fixing yet I cant seem to find the guts to just tell him. Every now and again he mentions something for the future, like decorating and I feel terrible lying to him, pretending to be excited. I'm finally in a position where I can afford to leave him and be financially independent I just need to bloody tell him 