How to formalise child contact

[LivingMyBestLife2020]

I can’t believe I’m having to write this.

I share my 2 year old with my ex. Ex is narcissistic and I finally broke free of him in January. Life has been wonderful since.

He sees son a couple of times a week. I try not to engage too much with him as unnerves and irritates me. He can be verbally abusive at times but never physical.

It was his birthday yesterday so son and I took ex out for food. He then came back to mine to put son to bed. Long story short, he came onto me and wouldn’t take no for an answer. I had to remove his hands from me more than once and ask him to leave. He came right up into my face calling me names and he scared me. He has things in his past that I’ve never believed but now I’m unsure.

Anyway, my question is, how do I go about arranging access and formalising it so I don’t have to speak to ex anymore?

Stop contacting him about anything other than your kid, period. You say you are free from him but you took him out to eat with your kid as if everything was alright between the two of you. The easiest way to handle visitations is through texting only, plus you have documentation of the conversation. There are 7 billion people in this world. Go have some fun.

First, report this to the police. Then call women's aid or rights of women. Try to book yourself into the freedom program.

Get a non molestation order in place through the courts.

Never, never do anything social with the man again.

This is very serious and you need to treat it that way. Don't try to minimize or excuse his behaviour, and don't worry about wasting police time. He has verbally abused you, assaulted you and tried to (or possibly succeeded in) sexually assaulting you.

I won’t be calling the police but I’m keeping all his messages. I put stop to his filthy hands immediately (he grabbed me round the waist and put one hand on my bum)
Things had been very amicable the last 6 months but it’s been the last few weeks now he’s found out I’ve started dating that’s he’s been so up and down and verbally (via text mostly) abusive. We don’t normally converse unless it’s about our son since he started being a jealous twat. He’s blocked after yesterday and I want to keep it that way. I told him me taking him for lunch meant nothing before we went but he still saw it as his right to put his hands on me (he never has before) and he never will get the opportunity again.

I just want to have to not talk to or see him ever again

He didn't "put his hands on you" he sexually assaulted you.

You are placating him and appeasing him to "keep the peace". That manipulation at best and coercive control is more likely.

Please at least do the freedom program, and report this to the police do you have that evidence in the future should you ever need it.