I think my marraige is over!

[Cosmo74]

what can i say - we are arguing over the same thing this last 5 years or more everytime i talk to him he lets me rant on not saying anything and then silent until eventually we just start talking again - we are married for 4 years have a 7 year old and a 2 year old and lost a baby in between - we have been together on/off since we were 12/14 - i just keep thinking that we met too early and we made a terrible mistake staying together.

any advice - i tried o tell him how i feel but he doesn't respond? should i just accept it is over - he will not go to relate i asked him before but he says if we cannot talk what is the point of talking to a stranger?

i am heartbroken - i really love him but do not like him atm if you know what i mean but the kids think the world of him and would be devasted if he wasn't here?

it is - what do i do now - how do you recover from a breakup - how do you explain to kids why their daddy doesn't live with you anymore? HELP

I'm so sorry you are going through this. I don't know how you get over it. All I can say is it takes time. A lot of time. Be kind to yourself, be there for your kids. That's all you can do. 2 years down the line, I am still getting over the breakdown of my marriage. It does get easier. Slowly. But it does. I promise.

Do you have some good support?

{{{hugs}}}

hiya sweetie,
I met my dd1's dad whwn I was young and spent 8 years with him.I left him when my dd was 6mts thought I had made a mistake and went back but left for good when she was 2.
It was the best thing I did and now we can get on as friends and raise our daughter beautifully between us.It has been a relief to finally find someone(my dh now)who I really love and didnt just settle for and I have 2 more gorgeous children which I would not have had otherwise iykwim.
If you love him till then push at making it work maybe he is feeling a bt down.I know that relate would not be right for me as I am quite private.
I know you must be feeling upset and angry but take time to think about something good btween you(not the kids although Im sure they are gorgeous) and build on that.
Dont let this go if you really want it...

Best of luck,will be thinking of you x

Are you okay cosmo?

I am really sorry to hear about your troubles, Cosmo. I am having counselling at the moment as I am experiencing similar troubles with my marriage and my counsellor has given me a book by Relate to look at. It's excellent. Here's a link:

www.amazon.co.uk/Relate-Stop-Arguing-Start-Talking/dp/0091856698/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1/026-0909061-4555631 ?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1191842323&sr=8-1

There are plenty more in the range if you don't feel this one is right for you.

Good luck.

Patsy x

thinking of you sweetie x

thanks for the replies - couldn't find this thread again so started a new ones - things are no better we are - tied talking again - he is helping alot more round the house - this is one of the problems but the main problem is us, we no longer show love/affection to one another - more like companions that husband and wife. please respond to other thread do not want to write too much here - will not be able to keep up with two threads if people respond to both - my head is spinning atm.

Thanks for all your support and thoughts

My other thread is called Relate or trial seperation - know if sounds drastic(sp) but think we need to do something!