Dp has 2 grown up daughters in their 30s. Both have young children of their own. I have a dd who is university age.
Life is becoming a nightmare because of his daughters. They are incredibly demanding and treat my daughter like she’s beneath them, ordering her around like she’s a servant or something. My daughter is very good natured and shrugs it off but it upsets and annoys me.
My partner does pull his dds up and has talked to them about their rudeness but little changes. One daughter in particular is very unpleasant to both me and my dd and is extremely selfish. For example, my partner had offered to give her his old car when he bought a new one but then Covid hit and could no longer afford to do so. She has been hostile about it ever since and doesn’t seem to get that circumstances beyond our control happened and we simply can’t afford to buy and new car anymore right now. The way she sees it is that her dad promised her something and then changed his mind. And that, in her mind, is unforgivable. She thinks that me and my dd are taking up too much of her dad’s attention and resources and if we were out of the picture, she’d be able to afford a new car and upgrade her house.
Not only is this not true in that, actually, dp and I share all bills equally and he doesn’t contribute to my DD’s living costs at all. But no matter what we say, she believes that I am the evil step mother who took her father away.
For context, she is a grown woman in her mid 30s
with 2 primary school aged children of her own. I met her father long after her parents divorce and we’ve been together 5 years.
I’m actually at the end of my tether and ready to leave the relationship. Dp feels guilty because he thinks he let his daughter down and so he just lets her kick him but the more he not only outs up with it bit think he deserves the kicking, the more he loses my respect. He prides himself on being a good father and he has materially provided everything for his daughters, giving them both sizeable deposits for their homes and being at their beck and call emotionally. But I actually am beginning to think that he has not been a good father and has raised two spoilt brats who are now adult spoilt brats.
I don’t know how to sort out this mess and am seriously considering leaving for my own sanity.