Bro trip...

[a00031]

Hey ladies! How do you feel about your BF or DH going on an all guy trip?

I wouldn't care, I trust him implicitly. He goes on motorbike trips quite frequently.

Wouldn't let him go if he called it a "bro trip" tho

Doesanyonereadthesethings nailed it for me.

Depends entirely on the circumstances.

Wheb I was younger, it would have been 'either of us can go anywhere, end of story".

Now, having experienced a stag do where my partner was in a lap dancing club where he (apparently) had a "table dance" with the price of entry (it was discussing before he went and I said I wouldn't be comfortable with strip etc clubs) accompanied by lying afterward ... A having dated an older man who told me it was par for the course (pun intended) for his golf groups (all married middle aged men, many grand fathers) to frequent brothels while away.etc. I'm less unreserved and enthusiastic, shall we say.

Also of you have children, the childcare issue comes up. It would need to be reciprocated or feels unfair (not that many women don't put up with that unfairness).

*if you have children.

Sadly all male trips seem to be seen by a percentage of men as opportunities to cheat, with with non sex workers or by buying sex workers.(the latter being a cert. for sex obviously).

What percentage that is, I don't know.

They certainly do their best to involve everyone to make themselves feel normal and try to prevent tattling to wives and partners in my experience.

@a00031

I'm from the states, my husband has a cousin that's like a brother to him across the country in California ( we live in ny) Now, the last time we went to visit him we went together. We're planning on going together again in febuary. But what if one year he wants to go on a bro's trip there without me? This is just me thinking ahead of course. I just don't know how I'd feel. I completely trust my husband but his cousin is single and a huuuuuge partier...sooo it's not like it would be a...going fishing kind of trip.

If you trust him, you trust him. If you think he'd cheat because his single mate is on the pull, you have problems.

So you have kids? Do you have shared finances?

I'd only object if it was for more than a night whilst we have 3 young kids. When we had 1 I'd say a long weekend. When we had no kids, I wouldn't mind at all. Unless we couldn't afford it or he

If we had shared

I'd react the same way I would expect my partner to act if I planned a girls trip, 'cool huni have fun, be safe'
I dont believe in telling people what they can or cant do, I tell them my expectations and let them figure it out by them selves.
I think it's great for people in relationships to do things apart, it keeps it fresh, and if you trust him and theres mutual respect there then I would expect him to behave as any responsible adult in a LTR would, faithfully. If he doesnt , well then you end it.
In all honesty plenty of people cheat, it doesnt always happen on holiday. A lot of the time they meet at work, in bars, at the gym. I'm assuming you dont have any issues with your husband doing any of those things.
If he go, wish him fun, make the most of having the place to yourself and arrange a girls night out.
Then when he gets home make the most of the fact that you've missed eachother and have lots to talk about.

I’d say, have fun.

What were you expecting the responses to be OP?

If we had shared finances them as long as we could afford it and I have equal access to funds to do the same it would be fine

Why don't you trust him op?

My DH has regularly gone on all male friends trips including Oktoberfest, Stag dos and just weekends away. I do this too with my friends. I only see it being a problem if it's unequal or you can't really afford it.

People do still have a life once they are in a relationship. I can't see how it would matter, as long as it's sensible given finances (if you share finances, the one going away should make sure all financial commitments are met before they blow money going away) and if you have children, their care is sorted while one of you is away. We both go away several times a year without the other (been married 12 years). The only condition is that it has to be cleared with the other first so we can make sure there are no conflicts (in case one of us has planned work travel or has to work a long day or something, someone has to be around to be home with dc).

Before we got married DH went to Brazil for the World Cup and France for the Euros with some of his mates - didn't bother me. We would text every couple of days and he'd call when he could (we didn't speak at all while he was in the Amazon for 4 days)

He's done weekends away with his friends as they live in various places around the country - again, doesn't bother me. Sometimes the girlfriends/wives are included, sometimes all of us go, sometimes some of us go.

Why are you preempting a situation that has so many variables involved?
The trust in a relationship is a key factor
How regularly a partner goes away
Who they go with
If it was the other way round, would they be fine with you going away?

You can't base how you might feel on other people's decisions within their relationship

DH has weekends abroad with his mates regularly
It’s fine ?

My husband has never been away with friends or family and we’ve been together since we were 15, so I’m not sure I’d like it to suddenly start now at 41.
I trust him completely, but I’d be jealous I wasn’t getting a holiday too!
I’m not sure my husband would be impressed if I said I was off on a trip either. But then the way we do things is probably not everyone’s cup of tea.

@DBML

My husband has never been away with friends or family and we’ve been together since we were 15, so I’m not sure I’d like it to suddenly start now at 41. I trust him completely, but I’d be jealous I wasn’t getting a holiday too! I’m not sure my husband would be impressed if I said I was off on a trip either. But then the way we do things is probably not everyone’s cup of tea.

I completely understand. My husband and I have been together since 16 and I'm not sure how I'd feel about it either. Since his cousin lives so far, sometimes I think him wanting to go on a bro trip will be something he may want in the future. This is just something I assume...not really a true discusion we've really had. I trust him completely but knowing that he'd be partying with his single cousin cross country isn't something that really sits well with me. He's a great husband and never has done anything that would make me loose trust in him...just something that makes me nervous if it would ever come up

what a weird thread
it’s not even an issue at present. if you don’t trust him, why are you with him? the phrase ‘bro trip’ is making me want to punch my laptop

I wouldn't be married to a man who said 'bro trip' or 'trip with the guys'.

But then I don't address other women as 'ladies'.

Strange thread.

@NiceGerbil

I wouldn't be married to a man who said 'bro trip' or 'trip with the guys'.

But then I don't address other women as 'ladies'.

Strange thread.

This is what I thought :)

@emmyhelly

what a weird thread it’s not even an issue at present. if you don’t trust him, why are you with him? the phrase ‘bro trip’ is making me want to punch my laptop

Then get off the thread...

@NiceGerbil

I wouldn't be married to a man who said 'bro trip' or 'trip with the guys'.

But then I don't address other women as 'ladies'.

Strange thread.

I'm from the states...this is normal where I'm from HAHAHA

You know I see a lot of different or strange threads on here sometimes but I try to lift other women up, give advice no matter what the situation is. What's the point in coming here and telling me that the way I talk is strange or that the thread is strange. Didn't we all learn at a young age... if you don't have anything to say don't say it at all??

you’re looking for advice. my advice is leave him if you don’t trust him. and stop worrying about things that haven’t happened. and stop using ‘bro trip’

Fine by me! I'd look forward to my firms trip!

*girls - ugh

It literally wouldn't bother me in the slightest if my dh wanted to go away with the guys and he could afford it without it effecting joint money. How odd that it could bother someone.

He's his own person with own friends! Perfectly normal thing to do. He'd have no problem with me going away with friends either. We trust each other. Wouldn't even been to ask each other permission