Why does ex not want to see me?

[whyowhys]

We broke up earlier this year as he said things were "moving too fast"
We didn't talk for 2 months.
Then he text and we started getting close again.
Then he backed off again and obviously I was hurt.
My mum died on Friday and he text me straight away to see how I was.
He text me yesterday and rang me this morning.
On the phone call he told me two months ago he had to unfollow me on social media because he couldn't stand seeing me.
He said he didn't want to see updates about me/pictures of me etc
Yet we still would text (but not as much as previous)
I don't get it
Why does he not want to see me?
I think he cares still.
Maybe he doesn't
I don't know
My heads all over

I’m so sorry about your mum

The dynamic with your ex sounds messy and unhelpful. I’d lean on other people you can trust to be there for you right now.

I'm really sorry about your mum.

No, he doesn't care about you. What he likes is the thought of someone still thinking about him so keeps dropping little things like that so you don't move on. Forget him and move on.

Thankyou,I think because of mum I'm just wanting someone.
I miss her so much already and it's been two days.
I still love him and in a ideal world I would get back with him

Sorry about your Mum OP.

At this difficult time you need good friends around you, not him.

He is a complete waste of time (sorry to be blunt). Please draw a line under him and go no contact otherwise he will always be there in the background messing with your head.

Take it for me, if he wanted to be with you he would be. You deserve better.

I know,I guess it's my own fault for over analysing all the time

So sorry about your dm op

Please just delete/block him. He’s a time waster and not someone you should lean on. You’re vulnerable with your emotions right now and this won’t do you any good.

I am sorry about the passing of your mother.

This man does not care about you. He is messing you about which is cruel and immature. I recall this happened to me a number of times and it was hurtful. I knew they did not like/want me enough but as I had already slept with them I felt attached in a weird way and allowed them to blow hot and cold.

He doesn’t care about you, he’s just scratching an itch. Move on from him. Now.

Sorry about your mum.

So sorry about your mum OP

I agree with the others, indecisive men are the worst. Very occasionally it's possible to stay in contact with these guys but ONLY if it's not going to mess with your head.
If he wants to make sure you're ok he's maybe not an awful person, maybe he's actually a nice guy, just doesn't want a relationship with you.

Sorry if that's not what you want to hear.

I am so sorry about your Mum

He doesn't know what he wants. He is not a good port in the storm you are going through.

Sorry about your Mum.

He's wasting your time and doing this because he wants your attention. He wants you to beg and grovel and promise the moon on a stick.

Who the fuck starts telling someone about un-following them on social media, when they are newly bereaved? A selfish fucker, that's who.

Personally I'd block him, but if you don't feel ready for that, then next time Prince Charming starts up on his 'woe is me' routine, point out that you have just lost your Mum and don't have time for his fragile ego.

I am really sorry about your mum.
It's an awful thing to happen.
I have lost both parents in the last few years.
I also had quite a lot of drama with an ex. I'd managed to get rid of him completely and begun to feel better about myself but he wheedled his way back in when my second parent died last year. I have now got rid of him again but the whole thing managed to interfere with my ability to grieve and messed my head up.

My ex, selfish fucker, gave me no support whatsoever just went on and on about himself and how sad he was that we had broken up (while still chasing other women and using prostitutes). Never once did he properly express sympathy or provide any kind of practical help or mental support.

Yours is exactly the same. My advice to you is to block him completely. You absolutely do not need him messing with your head at this horrible time. Find other people to lean on instead.