I just want to know..

[Bekind2020]

How do these fing men go through life being so abusive to their partners/wives.. I just get so much rage thinking how can they actively WANT to treat people that way. I'm a few months out of what was a horrifically violent and mentally abusive relationship. My ex partner regularly told me I had mental health issues. I'm just sat here tonight thinking, what the actual f how could he have wanted to treat me like that. Why do they do it.. Why!?

Power. Superiority. Low self esteem
Copying behaviour they’ve seen growing up
A need to ‘win’

It’s their problem tho. Not ours Nice decent normal men don’t need to rip someone else down so they can ‘win’

Because they are evil.

Sociopaths, narcissists whatever you want to call it. But the sum of it is that they are evil.

They need to crush the light out of anyone they see because they know they will never truly be able posess it themselves.

That's exactly it. I walked away from it all and he never thought I'd leave him..

Well done for leaving.

Therapy might help you if you feel you need it, but also these things take time and being angry is natural. People were telling me to forget my ex and how he acted the next day. It doesn't work like that.

After 5 months I sought counselling as I felt something still wasn't quite right in how I was feeling. Talking about all the stuff he did/moaning about him for a couple of months in counselling was all I needed to do at that time, but I know different things work for different people at different times.

I also did some of the Freedom Programme before Covid. www.freedomprogramme.co.uk/ Ironically I was doing it even before I left my ex- I thought I was just doing it out of interest. My local FP facilitator also ran a course called Own My Life which she ran over Zoom, as well as a Zoom Freedom. I can recommend the Freedom Programme or finding out what your local facilitator is doing, not least because you can meet some great women through it, so you can all let off steam to each other as you've all been somewhat in the same boat.